When a child appears in the family, the contact between him and his parents can safely be called "innate". But how to please the children of other parents, how to contact them? The question of how to please a small child is really relevant, since friends and acquaintances always have children.

Assessment of the situation

If you have to meet someone else's child, then an adult should take a responsible approach to this important meeting. It just seems that it’s enough just to appease a baby with a candy or a toy, in fact, building personal relationships is much more serious.

When asked how to please a child, there is great amount advice that is given not only by experienced parents, but even by professional psychologists. First you need to assess the existing situation, and then start a conversation. What is meant?

First, as soon as the child appears in front of his eyes, you need to carefully study his facial expressions, mood and behavior. Such small nuances will allow you to choose the most accurate communication strategy, to interest the younger generation, and not to annoy.

Secondly, looking into the children's room with one eye, it becomes quite obvious what the kid is fond of in his life, what toys he loves most of all, what cartoon characters he imitates. In fact, this is not at all difficult, since thematic clues will be scattered all over the place.

Thirdly, one can briefly observe children's behavior in communication with parents in order to understand what manner of dialogue is most characteristic of him, familiar. Thus, in the future, pleasant and friendly communication in a familiar language will turn out, and not a dual dialogue with an alien guest.

Fourthly, it is necessary to realistically assess the child's attitude towards a new acquaintance. As a rule, everything is "written on his face", so it will not be difficult to understand his subjective opinion about himself, for this it is not at all necessary to be a certified psychologist and conduct special testing.

Fifth, it is important to remember that even the most Small child- this is an already formed personality with its own tastes and preferences. You should not demonstrate your cold and superficial attitude towards the younger generation, since a child will certainly not respond to such a reaction with his favor and childish cordiality.

And the last but very important point: an adult should definitely start communication, since a child may simply be shy of a stranger. You should not get acquainted with the baby from a moralizing conversation, especially point out his mistakes. In this case, it certainly will not work to become the closest friends, but there will be no joy for children's eyes on the next visit.

If you have children's communication, how to please the child of your loved one? It is advisable to start a conversation with Russian articulate speech. It is very important that further dialogue still take place, otherwise the child will perceive a new acquaintance as not quite an adequate person.

First meeting

If the question of how to please a child is still relevant, you need to start with a gift. For example, all children love sweets, so a kinder surprise or a chocolate bar is a win-win for a successful first meeting. However, before handing such a souvenir, you need to introduce yourself, reach out for an acquaintance - in general, behave as if in the company of an adult new acquaintance. Children love this attitude, because with early childhood dream of growing up as soon as possible.

The answer to how to please young children lies in behavior. For example, the younger generation clearly feels negativity, flattery and deceit, so it is advisable to make a new acquaintance with an open and pure soul. The main thing is not to be silent, but diligently maintain any conversation. This is very important, otherwise the child will not be able to relax, feel comfortable, and in communication will only be embarrassed, nervous and constantly blush. You shouldn't allow this.

How will a child like a person whom he sees for the first time? If an adult at the first meeting manages to make a suspicious and taciturn baby laugh, then we can assume that close contact has already been established. One good joke, and we can assume that "it's in the bag", the main thing is that it be witty, understandable and timely. Moreover, further communication will no longer cause difficulties.

If the baby shows open indignation at such a new acquaintance, what should be done? How to please the child in this case, and is it possible at all? Do not panic, because this is just the first impression, which, if desired, can be changed in your direction. you will have to work hard, for example, a little friend can be offered an exciting game, or just a sincere story. You need to behave naturally, and not try to make a favorable impression on the young viewer.

How will a small child like a new acquaintance who first came to visit? First of all, he must win over his parents. The kid will silently observe adult communication and, seeing the favor and good mood moms and dads, he will relax in the new company. So there is nothing complicated, the main thing is to set a goal and demonstrate as much sincerity and feelings as possible. If the baby still manages to interest and attract children's attention, then we can assume that there appeared new friend from the younger generation.

If a child, when communicating with an adult, rubs his hands and crushes his fingers, then this means that he is too nervous. There will certainly not be any benefit from such a dialogue and a new acquaintance, so the baby first needs to be calmed and relaxed.

If an adult finds the right approach to his new acquaintance from the younger generation, then it will be a friendship for many years. Young children quickly become attached to good people, a good relationship retained even after growing up.

“Children are the flowers of life,” says folk wisdom. Sometimes these flowers produce smooth and shiny, sweet fruits, and sometimes they produce thorns. For years, parents and educators excel at raising children, and sometimes the result is zero. There is no desire to learn, disobedience, disrespect. You can list for a long time, but at the moment we will consider the problem already.
Reluctance to learn. Where is it from?

How to please a boy? With age, we understand how relationships are built between people, but in teenage years When the first love comes, it is still not at all clear how a boy can please. Many begin to copy the appearance of some famous personalities and try to imitate the manner of movie heroines, but everything looks very affected and out of place. Boys for the most part are interested in how you can spend time with a girl and what to talk about, and not in how skillfully she will play someone else's image.

To please a boy, you must start with appearance, only in this matter you should not try to become the same as most girls in school - it is important to be able to stand out. In order to emphasize your individuality, it is better to choose things of your style, and not radically change it. Wearing high heels, if before that it was pointless to wear sneakers all the time, there will be a lot of attention, but all of it will be devoted to an inept gait and will take the form of mockery. Staying in your image you need to become a little brighter - blue jeans when everyone is wearing dark; hair gathered in a ponytail, if everyone walks loose.

Grooming and style play a lot in the perception of a man and boys even in the most early age girls who have beautifully styled hair, neat clothes and the ability to combine accessories are noted. Stylish haircut, a couple of things latest collection and comfortable clothes will be the key to an attractive appearance. Trying to buy all fashion boutiques is not relevant, but in choosing an image, you need to focus on your age category, because what looks great on twenty-year-old girls is simply ridiculous on a girl of 11 years old.

The next point will be the choice of behavior, since one bright appearance is not enough. It is necessary to draw attention to yourself with actions, for which you do not need to do something extreme or outrageous, you should also avoid attracting attention with scandals and antisocial behavior. It is best to show your kindness and cheerful character, and not only in relation to the boy you like, but to everyone around you.

You can try to show your best side, but you should not completely remake yourself and be a completely different person next to the guy. Even if you succeed, in case of disappointment, it will be a pity for the enormous efforts spent on creating an illusory image. And you need to be prepared for disappointment, because after the boy liked you, you will begin to communicate closer and he may be far from the ideal that yours painted.

How to please a boy at school

The school itself imposes many restrictions on communication and its forms of manifestation, which makes it rather difficult to show sympathy. But at the same time, the presence of mandatory requirements for behavior and joint tasks helps to figure out even how to please a boy who does not like you. In the school process itself, there are many joint activities where you can help someone who you like. By participating in productions and showing your talents, you can change the perception of a guy. The main thing to remember is not to wait for attention and engage in more dialogue with him, as well as to show yourself, the only trick is to do this only on a business topic. Don't speak openly about own feelings if you know a boy doesn't like you, it's best to cooperate with him and show restraint. Such a calm approach contributes to the emergence of sincere interest, the guy at least wants to know how, interacting for so long, you do not even feel friendly feelings for him.

It’s great if there are additional circles or sections at the school where the guy you like goes - you can sign up there and you will have more common topics and time spent together. Approach carefully to the choice of these activities - the boxing section may not be the best option, but aeromodelling is quite suitable - and it will be easier to cope and will not cause suspicion what the girl is doing there. It is optimal that these activities satisfy your interests or you can choose others (gymnastics, drawing). Usually all classes are held on the same schedule, which means that you will have the total time in breaks and on the way home.

Using the lessons to start a relationship is not only not recommended, but also useless, for personal communication, breaks and time after class are best suited. If you try to attract attention during class, you can seriously spoil the relationship with the teacher, which will affect the entire process of staying at school.

You can meet more often at breaks, arrange random encounters, choose a place in the dining room next to the guy. Such meetings should not look intrusive and make him paranoid, if your class is now in another part of the school, and you are alone around the guy, then you will have to come up with an iron alibi why you need to be here (for example, the need to wait for the teacher - only then really wait for him and ask about something).

If the lessons end at the same time, then you can chat on the way home or even ask him for help - bring books, protect from yard dogs, tell that you are afraid of hooligans in the yard. You can offer to do homework together, but it’s better not to start with this. At the beginning, discuss the tasks at recess a couple of times, perhaps he can explain something to you or you can let him write off.

Attract attention appearance at school is not desirable, but you should not forget about it completely. Even the most boring form can be made more original by using jewelry or braiding hair. Everything that is not prohibited by the school charter can be safely used to emphasize your individuality. Even if a rule is set for white shirts, you can choose not classic, but with hand embroidery and beads instead of buttons - the main thing is to show imagination.

How to please a boy at 10

Perhaps the first thoughts on how you can please a boy come precisely at the age of 10. This is the easiest in terms of establishing ordinary friendly communication and the most difficult in the formation of inter-gender interaction, which is explained by the different speed of mental processes. While girls are already beginning to feel sympathy for guys, walking with them and communicating more, boys do not yet feel such a need. Girls already have the very style of communication, less and less they want to spend time with friends, and in those moments when they communicate with girls, they want to discuss the possibility of relationships with guys, find out who they like, and share information on how to improve the image. Boys still behave at this time, as before - they spend time with the guys, consider girls boring and do not particularly notice the difference in gender.

Winning the sympathy of a boy is a difficult task, since all his hobbies are outside the realm of girls. Some often begin to communicate with older guys, because they are already interested in girls and you can quickly find a common language with them, but not all of those who are older will agree to communicate with a younger girl. But the situation is not hopeless. Interest in given age need to involve, getting involved in common activities. If you know how to ride a bike or roller skates cool, you can arrange competitions, if you know an interesting abandoned house, then you can arrange an excursion there.

How to please a boy at 10 years old? It is necessary to show enthusiasm and character, if you are fascinated to look at the boy and nod to his every word, then he will not be interested. It is best to defeat him in some business. To overtake, it is better to pass the test, to climb a tree higher - this will attract his attention if only because the boy cannot allow the girl to defeat him. Competitions will help the emergence of friendship and strong relationship, especially if after a series of victories you lose to him, and in another area you ask for advice or teach you. For example, you can overtake him on roller skates, while asking him to teach him how to ride a skateboard, you can better hand over literature and ask to explain mathematics. You can’t constantly beat him, so the guy’s decreases, and he will find a circle of friends where he will look better.

You don’t need to tell a 10-year-old guy about your feelings, especially in a romantic manner from melodramatic films - it may not be clear to him, which pushes many to rather cruel jokes. Try to spend more time where he spends it and actively participate in everything that happens. If a crowd of boys is playing snowballs, then it is better to join, and playing for the opposing team - so he will definitely remember you. The worst thing you can do is to walk by with an arrogant and boring face, showing with all your appearance how frivolous snowballs are for a girl. He will simply understand that this should not be called with him, but he will always want to see a cheerful and mischievous girl who can have fun on a par with him. And even if he doesn’t realize what exactly is happening and doesn’t know what this feeling is called, but you are already becoming special for him.

How to please a boy at 11

By the fifth grade, boys gradually show interest in the opposite sex, begin to notice obvious differences. They are still trying to hide it, they still spend a lot of time playing games with guys, but they already notice girls. At 11 years old, in order to capture the attention and arouse the sympathy of a guy, you need to do the same as before - to be together more often and get involved in common activities. The only difference is that now it will take less effort. Boys at this age already regard help with homework not only as an opportunity to improve their grades, but also as a pleasant conversation. Many are asking for help, far from excellent students, but pretty girls - study becomes an excuse. In the same way, the genius of mathematics of one can simply indicate the section of the textbook where the necessary topic is explained, and the other girl will explain all the changes to some regularity.

In joint games and activities, it is worth starting to be careful - if earlier the attention was perfectly caught by the fact that a girl could defeat him, now it is starting to hurt self-esteem. It becomes important for guys to have their own prestige in the male environment and among girls. If a girl surpasses him, then it becomes embarrassing in front of other guys who can start teasing and joking, in addition, the image of a hero in the eyes of a girl is lost. If you play a competitive game together, then try to keep an equal score, you shouldn’t lose on purpose - all interest is lost from this, but every time it becomes irrelevant to win. Shift the focus from activity to communication.

Starting to feel sympathy for a girl, many try to hide it so carefully that they achieve the opposite feeling. Therefore, before looking for answers on how to please a boy who doesn’t like you, it’s worth watching him properly, maybe you are his ideal, just admit it while there is not enough determination and skill. It is important to become your own in the circle of his friends, to establish yourself as an excellent friend - this will not only help you to be together more often, but also give a kind of permission to communicate. Guys in this age range are very dependent on the opinions of friends, and if one day they look askance and do not approve of some girl, then communication with her will directly affect his reputation. The more you will be a friend to all the guys, the better the relationship with the chosen one will be.

And only after you have become a member of his group of friends and you have excellent relations with everyone there, you can begin to distinguish him from everyone. This can be done by asking his opinion, telling a story, looking at him, you can call him several times to spend time together without everyone else. The attention of a girl that everyone likes is very flattering for guys at this age.

It is possible to please a boy at the age of 11 at school if school communication is reduced to a minimum and, if possible, then the possibilities of joint creativity can be used to the maximum. That is, if a class needs a presentation, then you need to prepare it together, if you were instructed to prepare a presentation, then ask him to help after class. In the lessons themselves, do your homework and don't get distracted, even if a nice guy provokes you. It is important to set boundaries, and the lack of communication at school will motivate him to communicate with you after school.

How to please a boy at 12

At this age, social contacts expand, many begin to try themselves in other activities, in communication with other people. Everything that was previously unknown becomes interesting, there is a great desire to stand out. That is why at the age of 12 it is important for a girl not so much to join the team, as it was before, but to learn to stand out from the rest. Boys will notice exactly those who cease to obey the norms of society, standard systems of upbringing and education, and show their individuality.

If you had unusual hobbies that went by the wayside to support common interests Now is the time to start showing them off. Compliance with the tastes and interests of the guy becomes less important, now they are already able to perceive you not only as a friend, but also as a girl, so gymnastics, jewelry making or painting can give him the opportunity to admire your talents and your differences.

His hobbies can be shared if there is a sincere interest, in all other cases it is enough to respect and support his choice. If this is a sport, then you can go to competitions with him, watch performances and provide moral support. Also, you can perfectly and imperceptibly support him not only morally - grab a bottle of water or plasters, spare carbines or a map of the area, find out the schedule in advance and other little things will show your location. If this is a scientific activity, then you can show others how proud you are and admire his achievements. Guys at this age interact with the world and express themselves through activities, because the more you encourage and delve into his hobbies, the more needed he will feel. Even if you are infinitely far from what is happening, you can say: “and how do you understand all this? I don't understand anything at all." This is how indirect interest is manifested, and the guy begins to tell you more about his business, in addition, he will try to make it as interesting as possible. You don’t need to play along with him, and if you don’t understand, say so, the guy will try even harder.

It's still not worth rushing things, the guys just resigned themselves to the fact that girls can like them, the first couples begin to take shape. If you hurry up during this period, then the guy may never come up to you, but start walking with a less persistent girl. Remain the person to whom he can always call, with whom there is a lot in common and interesting.

How to please a boy at 13

At the age of 13, guys are already ready to take the initiative on their own, and the desire to communicate with girls comes to the fore. At this stage, the girl should begin to act more carefully, because if she continues to drive with the guys in a common company, she risks remaining in their same friend. Here it is important to start emphasizing your femininity.

Dresses and skirts should be more common in the wardrobe, the hairstyle should at least periodically be not only comfortable, but also beautiful, elegant shoes and beautiful nails - all these tricks help the guy notice your fragility and generally see the girl.

How to please a boy at 13? It is important to let him know about his sympathy, and now for this it is enough to smile at his appearance, laugh at jokes and listen. Guys like those they can make happy, so the more regularly you show him that you are glad to meet him, the more he will strive for this meeting, and the more he will try to please you.

Unstable, so it is important to praise and support him, so you will become something permanent and resourceful for him. At the same time, it is important to remember your condition and do everything possible to overcome your own complexes and keep your self-esteem at an adequate level. Trainings or courses, communication with girlfriends, self-improvement classes can help, and sometimes you can even ask a guy to express his opinion about you and cheer you up.

In the image and appearance, it is necessary to focus on a recognizable individuality. You can pick up a perfume for yourself so that the guy has associations about you even with the smell, you can sing a melody, and then when he hears this song, he will remember you again. Great to create your personal traditions - with hot chocolate after class or a wish good morning and cool picture. The more association points you build, the better. Extreme experiments with appearance should be postponed. Of course, with each clip of an alternative group, he will have associative memories of your acid-green hair, black lips and mini-skirt, but there are few guys who like this in life.

The sphere of interpersonal communication is becoming relevant, therefore it is important to know what a guy is interested in, where he spends his time. It's great if you manage to share his passions and keep the topic of interest. Your hobbies may not be the same, but you can look for places where they can be combined. For example, if you like to make jewelry and he likes to take pictures, you can ask him to make a portfolio of your work. If you love to travel and he loves cycling, then a shared bike tour is a great idea.

How to please a boy at 14

At the age of 14, it seems to girls that it is necessary to be the best in everything, then the guy will pay attention, but competitive moments have long given way to originality, naturalness and uniqueness. The most effective and most difficult thing to do is to be yourself. That is, laugh at what is funny to you, and not at what all the girls laugh at or only at the guy's jokes. If you don’t find it funny or humor seems offensive, it’s important to be able to talk about it, many guys spoiled by attention overstep the bounds of what is permitted and they just need a person who will put them in their place and make them try to be better. It is also important to go where you like and when you feel like it. Sacrificing your own sleep to stay longer at a party where everyone has gathered, provided that training tomorrow does not play into your hands. Guys like those who go their own way, focus on their own values ​​and do not succumb to the manipulation of society.

This is a rather difficult path that requires stability and confidence, since it is always easier to behave like everyone else without much thinking. The danger is that even the guy will not distinguish you from others, and you will not live your life.

Your main interest should be your own life - do not impose on the guy, let him be the first to take the initiative, which is important to encourage and show that you are pleased. But you shouldn’t run after him yourself, they quickly lose interest in such girls. It is perfectly acceptable to be active after a few of his first steps, but his actions should always be more. Do not tell everything about yourself, let there be a little mystery and scope for his imagination, if he knows your schedule, the motives for the meeting and refusal, every minute, then the interest gradually subsides and he does not want to explore.

Being yourself and being different are quite compatible things - you have different activities and moods. Despite the fact that everyone is pleased when they are praised and welcomed, guys are not interested when a girl is constantly sweet and unctuous. You can be frankly angry, sad, happy, fall into excitement, and - the greater the spectrum you allow yourself to show, the more intrigue and interest you will cause the guy.

How to please a boy by correspondence

Communication with boys is largely limited to places of acquaintance, usually a school, sections and general companies, most often courtyards. It is not always convenient to communicate directly, and it happens that not all of your real acquaintances like you. Social networks, online forums and other Internet spaces open up a lot of opportunities for free pleasant communication, and it is important to know a few basic rules in order to please a boy in correspondence.

If you like someone online, then you need to take the first step. It is best to start communication with a question that should provoke further joint discussion, and maybe even action. He should be on business, write “hello, how are you?” it is simply unacceptable, it is almost impossible to answer something to start communication. To get started, study the guy's page to navigate what you can apply for. He goes hiking - you need to recommend a good guide, he has a lot of photos - ask permission to use them to illustrate your presentation and so on.

At the beginning of the correspondence, try to choose long pauses - these are the first two hours after meeting. Then the rules change, everyone has a monitor besides real life, which makes its own adjustments to virtual communication, so they may not answer you further, because they are objectively busy. For the first time periods of communication, there can often be gaps between phrases when the first topic is exhausted and the second is not started. Pauses can occur because it is not yet clear what you can talk about with the interlocutor, it is important to throw up new topics for conversation, otherwise everything will remain so.

When communicating, try to be open, of course, you don’t need to immediately dedicate strangers to all personal secrets and give a code from a bank card, but tell some facts about yourself, answer questions in an extended way in order to extend the conversation. Also ask him questions, be guided in this by the interlocutor. If he is laconic, then either he does not want to talk about this topic or it is not interesting, choose something else, this is not an interrogation, communication should be easy.

An important point on how to please a boy by correspondence is literacy and the absence of obscene words. Even if you are going to transform the words into the wrong form to add humor, it is better to do it later, and at first you should write everything correctly, so that later the interlocutor understands that you are joking. Politeness, observance of the rules of etiquette is as important as in personal communication. Bragging, attempts to seem smarter than he, or cooler than you are, do not cause pleasant emotions in the interlocutor.

Good to add in a bit of reality. You can talk about how you are now waiting for the bus, making juice or what you had for breakfast today. You can share your impressions of a beautiful sunset or a funny puppy. It is especially cool if you accompany such little things that happened during the day with photographs, this helps a person to get involved in your life.

And remember, if some of your messages, even with the most important question, suddenly remained unanswered, this does not mean that the communication is over and you are no longer interested. Perhaps the guy was distracted, he did not notice the message and is considering a response. Take your time, be tactful and patient - let him resume communication when he is ready.

Question to a psychologist

I have a girlfriend (almost a bride) named Lena, with whom we have been together for quite a long time. She has a child, girl Yulia, she is 5 years old. I don't have children.
Initially, the girl did not want to introduce us - she was afraid that we would not find a common language. Then, nevertheless, I introduced her, everything seemed to be fine.
But then terrible jealousy began - as soon as Yulia saw Lena and me, even just holding hands, whims began, cries about "I want this, I want that, I want to be in my arms, I'm tired, I want to sleep, I want to eat." Fortunately, relatives agreed to look after Yulia, so we could spend time together with Lena. When we, nevertheless, intersected, then I, personally, simply ignored such behavior.
After some time, these whims greatly decreased, it seems that even somehow contact was established. And then she just started ignoring me.
Lena tried to talk to her, and according to her inquiries, it turned out that Yulia was used to always being the center of attention (she is the only small child in a large family), that everyone always rushes about her. But I don't and she thinks I'm bad.
The problem here is that I think that children should not be spoiled like that, they should not be made the "center of the world", because they only become more capricious from this. Plus, I don’t really know how to communicate with children of this age. I fear her, deep down, because I really don’t like tantrums and screams.
She, apparently, feels it, and also moves away.
I don’t want to lose relations with Lena because of this, we are very good together, we are planning life together I can't imagine my life without her at all.
How to find a common language with a child?

Dmitry, if you want to be with a girl, then you just need to establish a relationship with her child. And this is not an easy task.

She is not just capricious, she does not treat you as a kind uncle, but as something completely incomprehensible to her. And if children do not understand something, then they, like animals (instincts, you know), scream and cry.

Understanding takes time and correct behavior seniors. If you resist her, she will not give in.

I advise you, together with the girl, to turn to a family psychologist (namely, an adult), only by coordinated actions, you can inspire confidence in the child.

Good luck to you.

Dmitry! For most parents, children really are the "center of the world." I suggest that you simply enter this center, but not as an adult, but as a child. Let's dream up how it could be (and you will either do this, or come up with an option mine).

You will find out what toys Lenochka likes to play with. It is necessary to purchase a toy, such as she does not have (by the way, a great option is to buy it together in a toy supermarket, arranging a small game there. For example, the desired doll in one hand will start talking with a bear in the other hand - this will be a fun dialogue between two correspondent toys who they will interview the beautiful girl Lena who happened to be here: Oh, what a sweet girl, let's ask her if she can play with us, we are bored together. Agree, the three of us will have fun. .Here you offer to buy these toys and continue playing at home with you and your mother, because it’s impossible in the store. When communicating, be sure to sit down at the level of the child’s eyes. Your task is to make friends, love her like Lena. I will be glad to help you May everything work out for you.