To draw attention to ourselves, we try all our lives. It is very important for us that our parents, friends, loved ones and other people pay attention to us. Because with their love, our life is filled with colors.

We constantly dream and imagine situations in which we are a unique person, which other people constantly think about, with whom it is pleasant to communicate. We always want our opinion to be taken into account and we have always been in the first positions. But unfortunately, dreams remain dreams because we put ourselves above others.

When we make decisions on our own, people often try to help us by giving their advice. We, as egoists, reject and criticize any advice, and sometimes pass it on deaf ears, considering them useless. And at the same time, we want attention from them. But how can it be obtained if we refuse it ourselves.

To attract the attention of people dear to you, first of all, stop rejecting other people's attention. You always need to sincerely treat people who are trying to help you, listen to their opinion. And when they understand that their opinion is important to you, they will begin to reckon with yours.

If you want to draw attention to yourself, you need to try to maintain friendly relations with the one from whom you want it. If you need the attention of friends and colleagues, try to spend as much time as possible with them. If you lack the attention of relatives, try to trust them and listen to their advice. If you want to attract the attention of a loved one, then love him sincerely, trust him.

How to get attention from parents?

Parents educate us from childhood, we get used to them and completely trust them. And when we don’t get the attention they deserve, we feel insecure and even insecure, which greatly affects our self-esteem. Therefore, use the following recommendations to win them over.

1. Try to build with your parents straight Talk and tell them how much you miss them. Explain to them that right now you need their attention and care.

2. Together, remember funny stories from your childhood, talk about them. Recall times when your parents were very worried about you, such as when you got lost. This will evoke fond memories and have the desired effect.

3. Tell your parents your deepest secrets. They will understand that you trust them and will probably share their own, thereby strengthening the bond between you.

4. In your free time, invite your parents to take a walk with you, go to the cinema, cafes. Surely they will not refuse and you will spend time together, which will bring you even closer.

5. Do not refuse to help your parents, but it is best to take the initiative yourself. Then they will have free time to spend with you.

6. Listen to what your parents tell you. Perhaps you should take their advice and change? As you know, parents only want the best for their child.

How to get the attention of friends?

Friends are those with whom we spend best time. The attention of friends is very important to us, because without it, we have a feeling of loneliness. Therefore, to win over friends, follow these recommendations.

1. Change your attitude to life, be optimistic. I don't know people who like looking at sad faces. For that, I know that people like to look at energetic people who love life.

2. Perhaps you have an interesting hobby, then tell your friends about it. Surely they will be interested in your hobby and they will be interested in it. If you are not doing anything, then there is a reason to fix it. Find what you like and do it.

3. Learn to joke. Find or invent good jokes and thus entertain your friends. Just remember the main rule, jokes should be harmless.

4. Try to be the center of attention. Regularly attend joint events with your friends. Do not refuse them if they ask you for help. When they understand that you are always there, not a single event can do without you. And you will be constantly invited to spend time together.

5. Be the organizer of the meetings yourself. Try to organize meetings as interesting as possible. For example, invite friends to celebrate a holiday in an unusual place. The more meetings you organize, the more attention your friends will give you.

6. Tell your friends your secrets and let them know that they will remain, only between you. Thus, you will begin to trust each other and you will form attachment.

How to get the attention of a loved one?

The attention of a loved one is very precious to us. In its absence, it is possible to lose a loved one. Therefore, use these recommendations to save your relationship.

1. Always smile at your loved ones. With a simple smile, you show your attitude towards him. When a person sees a smile, he becomes pleased, as he understands that you like him.

2. Do an incredible thing for your loved one. For example, go on an unplanned trip. Your partner will be very pleased with such signs of attention.

3. Try to be constantly in sight of your loved one. It is very good if you can make him think about himself all the time. In the end, your soul mate may wonder: "Isn't this fate?"

4. Find out what your loved one's hobby is. Tell him that you like what he does. He will understand that you have similar interests and the idea will appear that you are made for each other.

5. Use the colors that your partner likes in clothes. Then the subconscious of a loved one will say that this is exactly the person he needs.

6. Try to hint that your frequent meetings are not accidental. Perhaps after this, your relationship will move to a new level.

"Treat people the way you want to be treated"

attention to each other

Sometimes women say, "My husband doesn't pay / doesn't pay attention." Our article today is not only for women, but also for men.

Because both women and men face a lack of attention in partnerships. And so that this does not destroy relationships, it is important to take certain steps in closeness to each other.

Somehow it happens that in a family, or even just in a couple, one gives "everything", the other - "nothing" or very little. Of course, we exaggerate the situation, but if you often feel that you give more than your partner, then this is your situation (described above).

Any partnership requires an equal contribution (attention, money, feelings, care, time, etc.) from both sides.

This can happen as follows: one of the partners invests more money in creating and maintaining relationships, while the other one invests more care. Or someone more violently, vividly shows feelings, while the other spends time planning a joint future.

The ability of each to appreciate the contribution of the other

The most important criterion for balance in a relationship is the ability of each to appreciate the contribution of the other in the form in which he makes. What is it about?

Each of us learns from childhood what investment in a relationship is by watching our parents (and other significant people), and then does the same as they do. And for him it is natural, normal and at the subconscious level - right.

In our personal relationships, when we meet a partner from a different family with different attitudes and values, we have to learn and expand our partnership skills.

And here a lot depends on the flexibility of a person's personality (and this is largely determined by the parental family).

Are you open to everything new:

• Do you like to change your wardrobe?
• Experiment with styles?
• Try different cuisines?
• Do you have a wide circle of acquaintances?

These and other factors reflect a person's ability to change.

If we are open to new things in life, then in partnerships it is easy for us to see the value of the new - that which we have not used before.

For example, for you, partnerships mean taking care of each other (cooking delicious dinner, ironing shirts, etc.). And for your partner, it is more important to just be together (watch TV, go to nature, etc.).

Therefore, it is very important in partnerships to be able to speak sincerely about your interests and the interests of your partner (to be very interested in him).

If you have a question: why should I be interested in a partner? Ask yourself how important this relationship is to you?

if they are important, then you have every opportunity to improve them the way you want it. We cannot change our partner, but we can always improve our relationship with him. And here the main thing is our desire.

See the value of a partner's contribution

So, the first thing to start improving relationships (for example, so that your husband pays more attention to you) is to see his contribution to your relationship and see the value of this contribution. How to see?

Look at what your partner is doing with pleasure. Most of the time we don't pay attention to it. For example, your partner is talking to the children or helping your grandmother. It's great if you tell him about this, but it's good to at least remember this more often.

Relationships will certainly develop and improve, and partners will be closer to each other if each sees his own contribution to the relationship and appreciates the contribution of the other.

Respect for each other's pace

The second thing that greatly affects the development of relationships is respect for each other's pace. By this word, we mean the emotional pace - how a person expresses himself in life (the type of person's temperament, his behavior patterns and the general energy of life).

There is one good phrase that we often say in our trainings: "One goes faster, but the team goes further."

How disrespect for the pace of a partner is manifested:

• "Come quickly"
• "let's do it again"
• "why are you silent?"
• “Well, how long can you wait?!” etc.

Not respecting the pace of another person, driving him, we definitely spoil the relationship.

When we were kids, we were always driven by our parents. And in adulthood we often push ourselves and others (we still have a subconscious desire to show our parents that “we are good” - we are in a hurry, we do what they want).

If you see that the husband / wife is not paying attention to you, then assume that there is a good reason for this. Maybe you criticize a lot (you don’t see and don’t appreciate his contribution to the relationship) or maybe you don’t know how to relax and don’t support him in this (“drive” your husband).

Maybe you lack value and self-respect. By identifying how this applies to your life and what exactly your difficulty is, you can see the direction for yourself and your partnerships.

The purpose of marriage is to bring joy. It is understood that married life is the happiest, fullest, purest, richest life. This is the Lord's ordinance about perfection.

The divine design, therefore, is that marriage should bring happiness, that it should make the life of both husband and wife more complete, so that neither loses, but both win. If, nevertheless, marriage does not become happiness and does not make life richer and fuller, then the fault is not in the marriage bonds themselves; guilt in the people who are connected by them.

Marriage is a Divine rite. He was part of God's plan when He created man. It is the closest and holiest bond on earth.

After marriage, the first and most important duties of the husband in relation to his wife, and the wife - in relation to her husband. The two of them must live for each other, give their lives for each other. Everyone was imperfect before. Marriage is a union of two halves into a single whole. Two lives are bound together in such a close union that they are no longer two lives, but one. Each bears a sacred responsibility for the happiness and the highest good of the other until the end of his life.

The wedding day should always be remembered and highlighted among other important dates in life. This is the day whose light will illuminate all other days until the end of life. The joy of marriage is not stormy, but deep and calm. Above the wedding altar, when hands are joined and holy vows are pronounced, angels bow down and quietly sing their songs, and then they overshadow the happy couple with their wings when their joint life path begins.

Through the fault of those who are married, one or both, married life can be a misery. The possibility of being happy in marriage is very great, but we must not forget about the possibility of its collapse. only correct and wise life in marriage will help to achieve an ideal marital relationship.

The first lesson to be learned and practiced is patience. At the beginning family life both the virtues of character and disposition are revealed, as well as the shortcomings and peculiarities of habits, taste, temperament, which the other half did not even suspect. Sometimes it seems that it is impossible to get used to each other, that there will be eternal and hopeless conflicts, but patience and love overcome everything, and two lives merge into one, more noble, strong, full, rich, and this life will continue in peace and quiet.

The duty in is unselfish love. Everyone should forget his "I", devoting himself to another. Everyone should blame themselves, not the other, when something goes wrong. Endurance and patience are needed, but impatience can ruin everything. A harsh word can slow down the merging of souls for months. There must be a desire on both sides to make the marriage happy and to overcome everything that hinders it. The strongest love most needs to be strengthened daily. Most unforgivable is rudeness in our own home, towards those we love.

Another secret of happiness in family life is attention to each other. Husband and wife should constantly give each other signs of the most tender attention and love. The happiness of life is made up of individual minutes, of small, quickly forgotten pleasures from a kiss, a smile, a kind look, a heartfelt compliment and countless small but kind thoughts and sincere feelings. Love also needs its daily bread.

Another important element in family life is the unity of interests. None of the worries of a wife should seem too small, even to the gigantic intellect of the greatest of husbands. On the other hand, every wise and faithful wife will willingly take an interest in her husband's affairs. She will want to know about his every new project, plan, difficulty, doubt. She will want to know which of his undertakings have succeeded and which have not, and be aware of all his daily activities. Let both hearts share both joy and suffering. Let them share the burden of worries. Let everything in life be common to them. They should go to church together, pray side by side, together bring to the feet of God the burden of caring for their children and everything dear to them. Why don't they talk to each other about their temptations, doubts, secret desires and help each other with sympathy, words of encouragement. So they will live one life, not two. Everyone in their plans and hopes must definitely think about something else. There shouldn't be any secrets from each other. They should have only common friends. Thus, two lives will merge into one life, and they will share thoughts, and desires, and feelings, and joy, and sorrow, and pleasure, and pain of each other.

Fear the slightest beginning of misunderstanding or alienation. Instead of holding back, a foolish, careless word is uttered - and now a small crack has appeared between the two hearts that had previously been one, it expands and expands until they are forever torn from each other. Did you say something in a hurry? Ask for forgiveness immediately. Do you have any misunderstanding? No matter whose fault it is, don't let him stay between you for an hour.

Refrain from quarreling. Do not go to bed with anger in your soul. There should be no place for pride in family life. You never need to amuse your sense of offended pride and scrupulously calculate who exactly should ask for forgiveness. Those who truly love do not engage in such casuistry, they are always ready to both give in and apologize.

Without the blessing of God, without the consecration of marriage by Him, all congratulations and good wishes friends will be empty words. Without His daily blessing of family life, even the most tender and true love will not be able to give everything that a thirsty heart needs. Without the blessing of Heaven, all the beauty, joy, value of family life can be destroyed at any moment.

Every member of the family should take part in the organization of the house, and the fullest family happiness can be achieved when everyone honestly performs their duties.

One word covers everything - the word "love". In the word "love" there is a whole volume of thoughts about life and duty, and when we study it closely and attentively, each of them appears clearly and distinctly.

When the beauty of the face fades, the sparkle of the eyes fades, and with old age wrinkles come or leave their traces and scars of illness, grief, worries, love. faithful husband should remain as deep and sincere as before. There are no standards on earth that can measure the depth of Christ's love for His Church, and no mortal can love with the same depth, but still every husband is obliged to do this to the extent that this love can be repeated on earth. No sacrifice will seem too great to him for the sake of his beloved.

There is something sacred and almost awe-inspiring in the fact that a wife, entering into marriage, focuses all her interests on the one whom she takes as her husband. She leaves her childhood home, mother and father, breaks all the threads that bind her to past life. She leaves those entertainments to which she used to be accustomed. She looks into the face of the one who asked her to become his wife, and with a trembling heart, but also with calm trust, she hands him her life. And the husband is happy to feel this trust. This is happiness for life human heart capable of both unspeakable joy and immeasurable suffering.

A wife in the full sense of the word gives everything to her husband. It is a solemn moment for any man to take responsibility for the young, fragile, tender life that has trusted him, and cherish it, protect it, protect it, until death snatches his treasure from his hands or strikes him himself.

Love requires special delicacy. You can be sincere and devoted, and yet in speech and action there may not be enough of that tenderness that wins hearts so much. Here's a tip: don't demonstrate Bad mood and offended feelings, do not speak angrily, do not act badly. No woman in the world will be more worried about harsh or thoughtless words that have flown from your lips than your own wife. And most of all in the world be afraid to upset her. Love does not give you the right to be rude to the one you love. The closer the relationship, the more painful for the heart from a look, tone, gesture or word that speaks of irritability or is simply thoughtless.

Every wife should know that when she is at a loss or in difficulty, in her husband's love she will always find a safe and quiet home. She should know that he will understand her, treat her very delicately, use force to protect her. She should never doubt that in all her difficulties he will sympathize with her. It is necessary that she never be afraid to meet coldness or reproach when she comes to him to seek protection.

If you honor your spouse, then the other is exalted; if not, then the other is humiliated.

You need to consult with your wife about your affairs, your plans, trust her. Maybe she doesn’t understand things the way he does, but she may be able to offer a lot of value, since women’s intuition often works faster than men’s logic. But even if the wife cannot help her husband in his affairs, love for him makes her deeply interested in his concerns. And she is happy when he asks her for advice, and so they get even closer.

If the day was favorable, she, along with her husband, shares his joy, if unsuccessful, she helps him, like a faithful wife, survive troubles, encourages him.

It is necessary that the hands of the husband, inspired by love, be able to do everything. It is necessary that everyone loving husband had a big heart. Many who suffer must find help in real family. Every husband of a Christian wife should unite with her in love for Christ. Out of love for her, he will go through trials in faith. Sharing her life, filled with faith and prayers, he will connect his life with Heaven. United on earth by a common faith in Christ, melting their mutual love into love for God, they will be eternally united in Heaven. Why on earth do hearts spend years growing together into one, weaving their lives, merging their souls into one union, which can only be achieved after the grave? Why not immediately strive for eternity?

Not only the happiness of a husband's life depends on his wife, but also the development and growth of his character. A good wife is a blessing from Heaven, the best gift for her husband, his angel and source of innumerable blessings: her voice for him is the sweetest music, her smile illuminates his day, her kiss is the guardian of his fidelity, her hands are the balm of his health and his whole life , her industriousness is the guarantee of his well-being, her frugality is his most reliable manager, her lips are his best adviser, her breasts are the most soft pillow on which all worries are forgotten, and her prayers are his advocate before the Lord.

A faithful wife does not need to be either the dream of a poet or beautiful picture, nor an ephemeral creature, which is terrible to touch, but you need to be a healthy, strong, practical, hardworking woman, able to fulfill family responsibilities, and nevertheless marked by the beauty that a high and noble goal gives the soul.

The first requirement for a wife is fidelity, fidelity in the broadest sense. Her husband's heart must trust her without hesitation. Absolute trust is the foundation of true love. The shadow of doubt destroys the harmony of family life. A faithful wife, by her character and behavior, proves that she is worthy of her husband's trust. He is sure of her love, he knows that her heart is invariably devoted to him. He knows that she sincerely supports his interests. It is very important that a husband can entrust his faithful wife with all household chores, knowing that everything will be in order. Waste and extravagance of wives have destroyed the happiness of many married couples.

Every faithful wife is imbued with the interests of her husband. When it is hard for him, she tries to cheer him up with her sympathy, manifestations of her love. She enthusiastically supports all his plans. She is not a weight on his feet. She is the strength in his heart that keeps him getting better. Not all wives are a blessing to their husbands. Sometimes a woman is compared to a creeping plant wrapping around a mighty oak - her husband.

A faithful wife makes the life of her husband nobler, more significant, turning him with the power of her love to lofty goals. When, trusting and loving, she clings to him, she awakens in him the most noble and rich features of his nature. She encourages courage and responsibility in him. She makes his life beautiful, softens his harsh and rough habits, if any.

Some wives think only of romantic ideals, and neglect their daily duties and do not strengthen their marital happiness by this. It often happens when the most tender love dies, and the reason for this is disorder, negligence, poor housekeeping.

A woman is endowed with the gift of sympathy, delicacy, the ability to inspire. This makes her look like a messenger of Christ with a mission to alleviate human suffering and sorrow.

For every wife, the main duty is the arrangement and maintenance of her home. She must be generous and kind-hearted. A woman whose heart is not touched by the sight of grief, who does not seek to help when it is in her power, is deprived of one of the main female qualities that form the basis of female nature. Real woman shares with her husband the burden of his worries. Whatever happens to the husband during the day, when he enters his house, he must enter into an atmosphere of love. Other friends may cheat on him, but the wife's devotion must remain unchanged. When darkness sets in and adversity surrounds the husband, the devoted eyes of the wife look at the husband like stars of hope shining in the darkness. When he is crushed, her smile helps him regain his strength like a sunbeam straightens a drooping flower.

With the blessing of the quiet Heaven

Angels fly to us

When, numb from grief,

The soul suffers.

If knowledge is the strength of a man, then gentleness is the strength of a woman. Heaven always blesses the house of the one who lives for good. A devoted wife gives her husband the most complete confidence. She hides nothing from him. She does not listen to the words of admiration of others, which she cannot retell to him. She shares with him every feeling, hope, desire, every joy or sorrow. When she feels disappointed or offended, she may be tempted to seek sympathy by talking about her feelings to close friends. Nothing could be more destructive, both for her own interests and for the restoration of peace and happiness in her home. Sorrows complained about to outsiders remain unhealed wounds. A wise wife will not share her secret misfortune with anyone except her master, since only he can smooth out all disagreements and disagreements with patience and love.

Love reveals a lot in a woman that prying eyes do not see. She throws a veil over her shortcomings and transforms even her most unpretentious features.

As the charm of physical beauty fades with time in labor and care, more and more the beauty of the soul must shine, replacing the lost attractiveness. A wife should always be most concerned with pleasing her husband and not anyone else. When it's just the two of them, she has to look even better, and not give a damn about her appearance, since no one else can see her. Instead of being lively and attractive in company, and left alone, falling into melancholy and silence, the wife should remain cheerful and attractive even when she is alone with her husband in her quiet home. Both husband and wife should give each other the best of themselves. Her keen interest in all his affairs and her wise advice on any subject strengthen him for his daily duties and make him brave for any battle. And the wisdom and strength that she needs to fulfill the sacred duties of a wife, a woman can find by turning only to God.

There is nothing stronger than that the feeling that comes to us when we hold our children in our arms. Their helplessness touches noble strings in our hearts. For us, their innocence is a cleansing power. When a newborn is in the house, the marriage is, as it were, born anew. A child brings a couple closer together like never before. The previously silent strings come to life in the hearts. Young parents face new goals, new desires appear. Life immediately acquires a new and deeper meaning.

A holy burden has been placed on their hands, an immortal life that they must preserve, and this instills in parents a sense of responsibility, makes them think. "I" is no longer the center of the universe. They have a new purpose to live for, a purpose great enough to fill their whole life.

“Children are the apostles of God,

which day by day

He sends us to speak

About love, peace, hope!”

Of course, with children, we have a lot of worries and troubles, and therefore there are people who look at the appearance of children as a misfortune. But only cold egoists look at children like that.

“Ax, what would the world suddenly become for us,

If there were no children in it,

Behind us - only emptiness,

And ahead - only a shadow of death.

What do leaves mean to trees?

And light and air through them,

Thickening into sweet, tender juice,

They go to the trunks, feeding them.

As if the leaves in that forest -

For the world children; through their eyes

We perceive beauty

given by heaven."

It is a great thing to take responsibility for these tender young lives, who can enrich the world with beauty, joy, strength, but who can also easily perish; the great thing is to nurture them, to form their character - that's what you need to think about when you arrange your home. This should be a home in which children will grow up for a true and noble life, for God.

No treasures of the world can replace the loss of incomparable treasures for a person - his own children. God gives something often, and something only once. The seasons pass and return again, new flowers bloom, but youth never comes twice. Only once is childhood given with all its possibilities. Whatever you can do to decorate it, do it quickly.

The main center of the life of any person should be his home. This is the place where children grow up - they grow physically, strengthen their health and absorb everything that will make them true and noble men and women. In a home where children grow up, everything around them and everything that happens affects them, and even the smallest detail can have a wonderful or harmful effect. Even the nature around them shapes the future character. Everything beautiful that children's eyes see is imprinted in their sensitive hearts. Wherever a child is brought up, his character is affected by the impressions of the place where he grew up. The rooms in which our children will sleep, play, live, we must make as beautiful as the means allow. Children love pictures, and if the pictures in the house are clean and good, then they have a wonderful effect on them, make them more refined. But the house itself, clean, tastefully decorated, with simple decorations and with a pleasant environment, has an invaluable influence on the upbringing of children.

The great art is to live together, loving each other tenderly. It has to start with the parents themselves. Each house is similar to its creators. A refined nature makes a house refined, a rough person makes a house rough.

There can be no deep and sincere love where selfishness rules. Perfect love is perfect self-denial.

Parents should be what they want to see their children - not in words, but in deeds. They should teach their children by the example of their lives.

Another important element of family life is a loving relationship with one another; not just love, but cultivated love in the daily life of the family, the expression of love in words and deeds. Courtesy in the house is not formal, but sincere and natural. Children need joy and happiness just as much as plants need air and sunlight.

The richest legacy that parents can leave their children is a happy childhood, with fond memories of father and mother. It will illuminate the coming days, keep them from temptations and help in the harsh everyday life when children leave their parental shelter.

"Let your house be like a garden,

And childhood is filled with happiness.

Oh, may God help every mother to understand the greatness and glory of the work ahead of her, when she holds a baby at her breast, whom she needs to nurse and raise. As for children, the duty of parents is to prepare them for life, for any trials that God sends down on them.

Be committed. Respectfully accept your sacred burden. The strongest ties are the ties that bind a person's heart to a real home. Even in a real house Small child has its own voice. And the appearance of a baby affects the entire family structure. The house, no matter how modest, small, for any family member should be the most expensive place on earth. He should be filled with such love, such happiness, that no matter where a person then wanders, no matter how many years pass, his heart should still reach for his home. In all trials and tribulations native home- refuge for the soul.

Willpower is the basis of courage, but courage can only grow into real masculinity when the will yields, and the more the will yields, the stronger the manifestations of masculinity.

There is no act on earth more suitable for a man than when a man in the prime of his life, like a small child, bows down with love to his weak parent, showing him respect and respect.

We know that when He refuses our request, it would be to our detriment to do so; when He leads us on a different path than we have planned, He is right; when He punishes or corrects us, He does it with love. We know that He does everything for our highest good.

The soul writes its history on the body.

As long as the parents are alive, the child always remains a child and must respond to the parents with love and respect. The love of children for their parents is expressed in complete trust in them. For a real mother, everything that her child is interested in is important. She listens to his adventures, joys, disappointments, achievements, plans and fantasies just as willingly as other people listen to some romantic story.

Children must learn self-denial. They won't be able to have everything they want. They must learn to let go own desires for the sake of other people. They should also learn to be caring. A carefree person always causes harm and pain, not intentionally, but simply through negligence. In order to show care, not so much is needed - a word of encouragement when someone is in trouble, a little tenderness when the other looks sad, in time to come to the aid of someone who is tired. Children must learn to be helpful to their parents and to each other. They can do this without demanding undue attention, without causing others worries and anxiety because of themselves. As soon as they grow up a little, children should learn to rely on themselves, learn to do without the help of others, in order to become strong and independent.

Parents sometimes sin by over-anxiety, or by foolish and constantly irritating admonitions, but sons and daughters must agree that at the bottom of all this over-concern is a deep concern for them.

A noble life, a strong, honest, serious, charitable character - this is the best reward for parents for the tiring years of selfless love. Let children live in such a way that parents in old age can be proud of them. Let the children fill with tenderness and caress their fading years.

Between brothers and sisters there should be a strong and tender friendship. In our hearts and our lives, we must protect and grow everything beautiful, true, holy. Friendships in our own home, in order for them to be deep, sincere and cordial, should be formed by parents, helping souls to come closer. There is no friendship in the world purer, richer and more fruitful than in a family, if only to direct the development of this friendship. A young man should be more polite to his sister than to any other young woman in the world, and a young woman, until she has a husband, should consider her brother the closest person in the world to her. They must protect each other in this world from dangers and deceitful and disastrous paths.

An invisible Guardian Angel always hovers over each of us.

Father, what is life?

Battle, my child.

Where the well-aimed can miss,

And the most vigilant to be deceived,

And the heart of a brave man trembles,

Where the enemy does not sleep day or night,

That battle embraces the whole world -

You have to stay in it until the end.

For everybody young man life is especially difficult. When he steps into it, he needs the support of everyone who loves him. He needs prayers and the help of all his friends. Because of the lack of loving support, many young people lose the battles of life, and those who emerge victorious often owe this victory to the love of faithful hearts, which instilled hope and courage in their hours of struggle. In this world, it is impossible to know the true value of true friendship.

Each devoted sister can have such a strong influence on her brother, which will lead him, like the finger of the Lord, along the right path of life. In your own home, by your own example, show them all the sublime beauty of true noble femininity. Striving for everything tender, pure, holy in the divine ideal of a woman, be the embodiment of virtue and make virtue so attractive to everyone that vice always causes only disgust in them. May they see in you such purity of soul, such nobility of spirit, such divine holiness, that your radiance will always guard them wherever they go, like a protective shell or like an angel hovering over their heads in eternal blessing. Let every woman, with the help of God, strive for perfection. When your brother is tempted, then visions of such love and purity will appear before his eyes that he will turn away from the temptress in disgust. A woman for him is an object of either respect or contempt, and this depends on what he sees in the soul of his sister. Therefore, the sister should try to win the love and respect of her brother. She could do no more harm if she inspired him with the idea that all women are heartless and frivolous, craving only pleasure and wanting to be admired. And the brothers, in turn, should guard the sisters.

We are not fully aware of our power,

That every day we do good or evil.

An evil word killed someone

And good someone saved.

Words are small, actions are small,

Of those that we immediately forget,

We don't care about them at all,

And the weak break from it.

Attitude towards women The best way test the nobility of a man. He must treat every woman with respect, regardless of whether she is rich or poor, high or low in public position, and show her all kinds of signs of respect. A brother must protect his sister from any evil and unwanted influence. For her sake, he must behave impeccably, be magnanimous, truthful, unselfish, love God. Everyone who has a sister should cherish and love her. The power that she has is the power of true femininity, which conquers with the purity of her soul, and her strength is in softness.

Purity of thoughts and purity of soul - this is what really ennobles.

Without purity, it is impossible to imagine true femininity. Even in the midst of this world, mired in sins and vices, it is possible to preserve this holy purity. “I saw a lily floating in the black swamp water. Everything around was rotten, but the lily remained clean, like angelic clothes. A ripple appeared in the dark pond, it shook the lily, but not a speck appeared on it. So even in our immoral world, a young woman can keep her soul spotless by radiating holy selfless love. The heart of a young man should rejoice if he has a beautiful noble sister who trusts him and considers him her protector, adviser and friend. And a sister should rejoice when her brother has become strong man able to protect her from the storms of life. Between brother and sister there should be a deep, strong and close friendship, and they should trust each other. Let the seas and continents lie between them, their love will forever remain faithful, strong and true. Life is too short to be spent fighting and quarreling, especially in the sacred circle of the family.

Hard work, difficulties, worries, self-sacrifice, and even grief lose their sharpness, gloominess and severity when they are softened by tender love, just as cold, bare, jagged rocks become beautiful when wild vines wrap their green garlands around them, and tender flowers fill all the recesses and cracks.

Each house has its own trials, but in the true house peace reigns, which cannot be disturbed by earthly storms. Home is a place of warmth and tenderness.

It is necessary to speak in the house with love.

Let just one word

But say it with love.

And whisper a prayer to the Lord

And the choir of angels will rejoice,

And your soul will be with Heaven forever.

I heard the word, quiet, gentle,

Like the breath of a summer afternoon

I took him so close to my heart

And remember him forever

In my heart, whose knock and beat

This word does not silence.

Until his last moments

May it continue to live in it.

In such a house only beauty and gentleness of character can be brought up. One of the misfortunes of our time is that quiet family evenings are being crowded out by business, entertainment, and movement in society.

Every beautiful thought that comes into the mind of a child subsequently strengthens and ennobles his character. Our bodies grow old against our will, but why shouldn't our souls always be young? It is simply a crime to suppress children's joy and force children to be gloomy and important. Very soon life's problems will fall on their shoulders. Very soon, life will bring them worries, worries, difficulties, and the burden of responsibility. So let them remain young and carefree as long as possible. Their childhood should, as far as possible, be filled with joy, light, and merry games.

Parents should not be ashamed of the fact that they play and play pranks with their children. Maybe that's when they're closer to God than when they're doing what they think is the most important job.

The songs of childhood are never forgotten. Memories of them lie under the burden of care-filled years, like delicate flowers under the snow in winter.

In the life of every home, sooner or later, comes a bitter experience - the experience of suffering. There may be years of cloudless happiness, but there will certainly be sorrows. The stream that has been running for so long, like a merry brook running in bright sunlight through winter meadows among flowers, deepens, darkens, dives into a gloomy gorge or falls down a waterfall.

In the solitude and silence of the monastery,

Where guardian angels fly

Far from temptation and sin

She lives, whom everyone considers dead.

Everyone thinks she already lives

In the Divine heavenly realm.

She steps outside the walls of the monastery,

Submissive to my increased faith.

No one knows what holy sacrament takes place in an infant who is destined to live on this earth for only an hour. He does not live it in vain. In this short hour, he can accomplish more, leave a deeper mark than others, living for many years. Many children, dying, bring their parents to the sacred feet of Christ.

There is grief that hurts even more than death. But the love of God can turn any trial into a blessing.

"Behind the cloud lies the starlight,

After the rain, the sunbeam shines

God does not have unloved beings,

He sends blessings to all his creatures!”

And so the life of the true home flows, sometimes in bright sunlight, sometimes in darkness. But in the light or in the darkness, she always teaches us to turn to Heaven, as to the Great House, in which all our dreams and hopes come true, where bonds again torn on earth are united. In everything we have and do, we need the blessing of God. No one but God will support us during the great tribulation. Life is so fragile that any parting can be eternal. We can never be sure that we will still have the opportunity to ask for forgiveness for an evil word and be forgiven.

Our love for each other can be sincere and deep on sunny days, but it is never as strong as on days of suffering and grief, when all its previously hidden wealth is revealed.

) Gary Chapman )

The aim of the second stage is the formation of the ability to see a peer, pay attention to him and be like him .

task This stage was to distract children from fixation on their own "I" and focus on their peers' attitude towards themselves and draw their attention to a peer in itself, outside the context of their relationship. During the games, the child had to concentrate as much as possible on something else. At this stage, along with well-known and traditional games such as "Mirror", "Echo", "Broken Phone", new games developed by the authors were used. Here are some examples:

"Common Circle"

An adult gathers children around him. “Let's sit on the floor now, but so that each of you can see all the other guys and me and so that I can see each of you” (the only correct solution here is to create a circle). When the children sit in a circle, the adult says: “Now, to make sure that no one is hiding and I see everyone and everyone sees me, let each of you greet everyone in a circle with your eyes. I'll start first; when I say hello to everyone, my neighbor will begin to say hello. The adult looks into the eyes of each child in a circle and slightly nods his head; when he has "greeted" all the children, he touches his neighbor on the shoulder, inviting him to say hello to the children.

"Talking Through Glass"

An adult helps the children pair up and then says: “Imagine that one of you is in a large store, and the other is waiting for him on the street. But you forgot to agree on what you need to buy, and the exit is at the other end of the store. Try to negotiate purchases through the window glass. But remember that such a thick glass separates you that trying to scream is useless: your partner will not hear you anyway. After you have "agreed", you can discuss whether you understood each other correctly. Then you can switch roles.

"Find your brother or sister"

Having gathered the children around him, the adult says: “Do you know that all animals are born blind?

And only after a few days they open their eyes. Let's play blind animals. Now I will go up to everyone, blindfold him with a handkerchief and tell him whose cub he is. Each of you will have your own brother or sister who will speak the same language with you: kittens - meow, puppies - whine, calves - low. You will have to find each other by sound." An adult blindfolds the children and tells everyone in a whisper whose cub he is and what sounds he should make. It is necessary to distribute roles in such a way that there are two cubs of each of the animals in the group. Children crawl on the floor, "speak" their language and look for another child who speaks the same language. After the children have found their pairs, the teacher unties their eyes and offers to get acquainted with other pairs of cubs. Children crawl around the group, get to know each other, each speaking their own language.

th stage. Movement Consistency

The main task of the next stage was to teach the child to coordinate his own behavior with the behavior of other children.

The rules of the games of the third stage were set in such a way that in order to achieve a certain goal, children must act with maximum coordination. This requires from them, firstly, great attention to their peers and, secondly, the ability to act taking into account the needs, interests and behavior of other children. Such coherence contributes to the direction of attention to the other, the cohesion of actions and the emergence of a sense of community. Let us dwell on the description of some games that require coordination of movements.

"Making Sculptures"

The adult helps the children pair up and then says, “Let one of you be the sculptor and the other the clay. Clay is a very soft and docile material. Now I will give each sculptor a photo of his future sculpture, do not show it to your partner. Take a close look at your photo and try to mold your partner into exactly the same statue. At the same time, you cannot talk, because the clay does not know the language and cannot understand you. An adult distributes photographs of various statues and monuments to children. Then he chooses any child and begins to “sculpt” a sculpture out of him, after showing the whole group a photograph of his future monument. After that, the children “sculpt” on their own, an adult watches the game and approaches the guys who do not succeed in something. Then the children show their sculptures to the teacher and the rest of the couples. After that, the adult distributes the photos again and the children switch roles.

"Compound Shapes"

The teacher sits the children around him and says: “Those of you who were in the circus or in the zoo must have seen an elephant there. And who was not - saw his image in the picture in the book. Let's try to picture it. How many legs does he have? That's right, four. Who wants to be the feet of an elephant? Who will be the trunk? etc. Thus, children are selected, each of which will depict some part of the elephant's body. The teacher helps the children sit on the floor in the correct order. Ahead is a trunk, behind it is a head, on the sides are ears, etc. When the elephant is composed, the teacher invites him to walk around the room: each part must follow the order. Any animal can be used as a compound figure. If there are a lot of children in the group, you can complicate the game and make two animals that can communicate: shake hands, sniff each other, wag their tails when they meet, etc.

th stage. Shared experiences

The fourth stage consisted of games aimed to experience common emotions. In many of the games listed above, children are united not only by the same movements, but also by a common mood, a common game image. Such a commonality of feelings allows you to feel unity with others, their closeness and even kinship. All this destroys alienation, makes protective barriers unnecessary and creates a community of children. At the next, fourth stage, such a community of experiences is created on purpose. Shared experience of any emotional states(both positive and negative) brings children together, generating a sense of closeness, community and a desire to support each other. The feeling of danger and fear of an imaginary enemy is especially acute. It is these experiences that are created in many games of this stage. Let's take an example of such a game.

"Evil Dragon"

This game requires several large cardboard or wooden boxes that can fit 2-3 children. At the beginning of the game, an adult invites children to become gnomes living in small houses. When the children take their places in the box houses, the adult tells them: “There is a big trouble in our country. Every night, a big, big, evil dragon arrives, which takes people to his castle on the mountain, and no one knows what happens to them next. Exists the only way escape from the dragon: when dusk approaches the city, people hide in their houses, sit there embracing and persuade each other not to be afraid, console each other, stroke. The dragon cannot stand affectionate and kind words and when he hears them coming from the house, he tries to fly over this house as quickly as possible and continues to search for another house from which such words are not heard. So the last Sun rays slowly go out, twilight descends on the city and people rush to hide in their houses and hug tightly. An adult walks between the houses, imitating a dragon, howls terribly, threatens, stopping at each house and looking inside, and, making sure that the children inside the house support and comfort each other, he moves on to the next one.

th stage. Mutual help in the game

At this stage, it becomes possible to use games that require children to help each other, show empathy and rejoice. The use of such games without prior preparation leads to the fact that the motivation to help other children is not disinterested, but rather pragmatic or normative: I help because adults praise me for it or because the teacher said that I need to help. In order for children to really want to help another, it is necessary to first create a favorable climate in the group, an atmosphere of direct, free communication and emotional closeness.

Only after at the 4th stage the children experienced common and identical feelings that brought them together, you can use games that require children to empathize with another, giving them the opportunity to help and support their peers. Here is a description of one of the games.

"Living Dolls"

The teacher divides the group into pairs. “Let's imagine that your dolls come to life not only at night, but also during the day. They can talk, ask, run, etc. Let's imagine that one of you is a child, and the other is his girl doll or boy doll. The doll will ask for something, and its owner will fulfill her requests and take care of her. An adult offers to pretend to wash the hands of the doll, feed it, take a walk, put it to bed, etc. At the same time, the teacher warns that the owner must fulfill all the whims of the doll and not force her to do what she does not want. In the next game, the children will switch roles.