I had a work colleague named, say, Alexey. He was, because we no longer work together, but he is, and he is alive. Once he asked me to take his wife, say, Anya, to work with him. I invited her for an interview, talked it over, but I didn’t find any open vacancies for her skills. I took the phone from her and promised to call as soon as something appeared. I plugged the phone into my cell phone. It was a long time ago and I completely forgot about it.

And relatively recently, my colleagues and I got to the point where I was ready to kiss my mother-in-law, switched to autopilot and miraculously got home. At home, I carefully shook out the contents of my pockets on the floor, undressed ... 70-75 percent and collapsed on the marriage bed, while slightly crushing my wife (judging by my aching ribs in the morning).
I wake up in the daytime from a screech that destroys eardrums, turning into ultrasound, accompanied by increasing damage to my body from small and sharp fists.

I sit on the bed with eyes closed. The line "Starting MS DOS ..." pops up in my head, and the characteristic crackle of the hard drive is heard. At the end of the process of loading the drivers of vision and hearing, I open my eyes and see the evil face of my wife, who, in the process of practicing blows on a live pear, abundantly pours neologisms with well-known roots on me.
When all the suffixes and prefixes, as well as their various combinations, began to come to an end, and the arms got tired, I finally managed to inquire about the reason for the massive attack.

Then they fired at me with a phrase like: "I knew that you were a bl ... n (womanizer), but also a pervert !!!", and with new force a hail of life-affirming blows and kicks followed with a hit on yesterday beaten off by her own elbows ribs.
The passage to the building with the subsequent transfer of the dialogue to the stalls made it more constructive, and I heard the question: “Who is this perverted bitch Anna?”.
It turns out that this counterintelligence officer got into my mobile and found the phone of the aforementioned Anna there. At the same time, it should be noted that I carefully cleaned all the phones of my former passions and similar “non-productive contacts” from my mobile phone long before the wedding.

Then I realized that Anna, me and the massive attack are united precisely by perversions. I goggle my eyes at my wife, but after a couple of seconds, I am twisted with laughter, which infuriates her even more, and she has clearly already begun to plot mokruha.
End.
P.S. The surname of my colleague and, accordingly, his wife is MazO (with an emphasis on “O”), and until that day I had never thought of a different reading of this surname.

I know many wives who suffer terrible male point vision as an ailment, even a perversion. They somehow strangely understand the phrase "guardian of the family hearth." And they begin to guard him so fiercely that instead of a gentle, affectionate and sexy housekeeper, they get some kind of housekeeper.

Since childhood, the girl was driven into her head: a good wife has sterility, cleanliness and light at home, as in a Soviet clinic. Hot food is prepared, children are taken care of. Such a husband will not leave. My husband, they say, in a clean house is good and calm. Who would argue. But there is one BUT...

Here, for example, is this: a good housewife has cleanliness at home. The woman absorbed this statement with her mother's milk and is happy to try. Only she took it too literally. Only in the part that the house should be clean, and not in the part that the husband should be comfortable.

All day long she scrubs something, scrapes, and often scrapes with hands without gloves. Grunts, puffs, kicks her husband.

Ungrateful! I! For you! I'm dying here! And you scattered your socks!
Well, socks lie and lie. There are not asked. But now these are not just socks, but an attempt on the role of a good wife, in whose house the mouse will not run once again, and the squirrel will not fart.

The woman is unhappy, the man is excited, no rest! The most important thing that she was supposed to keep - the peace of a man - was destroyed! Everything, the action has lost its meaning.

Or, for example, a childhood girl heard that a woman should cook. Plentiful, satisfying and definitely hot. Moreover, food that is useful for the whole family, beautiful and healthy. And so she stands all evening at the stove, although she does not like it at all, and tries to surprise her husband with tasty and healthy food. And then she's out of her mind and even has no mood for sex.

Well, if you don't want to cook, don't cook. Boil dumplings. Or buy ready-made buckwheat. Or order a pizza. It seems to me that 3/4 of healthy men would rather be pleased with delicious and healthy pussy for dinner than culinary delights.

Or a girl from the age of 10 will drive into her head that she should be a good mother. And let's bring your idea to life with increased seriousness. Runs after an unfortunate teenage child, shoving him by force into all sorts of clubs and sections. She got the child excited, there was no time to sit down herself, no mood. Again, she yells at her husband: help me cope. The nerves of all households are on the verge of a breakdown. And all for what? For the happiness of loved ones, and for the sake of ideal family. But where is the meaning and happiness in this action?

It seems to me that at least half of divorces would not happen if a woman stopped trying to be perfect. This is the main perversion, which is even more dangerous than indifference. To be the keeper of the hearth means not to keep it in sterile cleanliness, in which a man dies like a microbe. This means making sure that everyone in the house is happy. And it is good according to them, and not to your ideas about it.

More than anything, substandard women who have come into circulation over the years love to argue that a young husband or lover is normal.

Big difference in age? No problem! The main thing is not a flabby body that smells like a grave, but the feelings that arise between people.

Well, yes. Well, yes. Maybe.

Demi Moore admitted that during her marriage to Ashton Kutcher, she agreed to a "threesome". Only now, 8 years after the termination of the misalliance, the actress shared what was really behind beautiful picture their marriage.

Demi Moore said that the young husband twice offered her to let another woman into bed to fall in love with a little three. And the wife agreed, trying to please her husband, who was 16 years younger than her.

And where was she to go?

“I wanted to show him how fun and cool I can be. But our two meetings with her were a terrible mistake." tells tales now Demi Moore.

No, dear, that's not what you wanted to show your young husband. You I had to agree to perversions, because I distinctly and clearly realized that your old (45-year-old at that time) body is illiquid.

Successful, world famous richest woman she decided for herself that it would be better if she were in bed, than a young husband would make love without her.

Think about it. Just think about this horror. Understand to what despair and loss of self-respect the woman has reached! And this is not a downtrodden woman from Penza, but a world-class star!

Now the actress admits that Kutcher still cheated on her without her throughout the years of marriage. And these were not only film colleagues, but girls-girlfriends of the daughter of Demi Moore.

To bed, kids! Photo: Social networks

Once Ashton was caught by his wife on a young girl - on the day of the wedding anniversary.

That's what the age difference between spouses is. Here's what's behind beautiful photos couples of different ages with which shit-magazines and Escortgram stuff you.

Photo: Social networks

You can continue to scream stubbornly that 15 years (and even more) is a very small difference for happy marriage. But once in such a relationship, any of you will immediately understand: a woman should always be younger so that her husband does not fight young girls.

But the husband can be no more than 10 years older, so that he has a standing position at least enough to somehow satisfy the sexual needs of his young wife. And if this is not the case, betrayal will surely happen.

And most importantly, it’s not the trips to the left that are terrible here, but the psychological pressure in which the age-related illiquid spouse finds himself - after all, he will be told in plain text that he himself is to blame for being cheated on. And at best, they will be invited to join the young in bed.

I'm sure Ashton said that to Demi Moore: your flabby breasts and rumpled stomach are worse than the elastic bodies of your daughter's friends! You understand everything yourself, sweet bun the day before yesterday!

Will you argue now?