AT modern family Having a babysitter is no longer a luxury, but rather a necessity. Moms and dads have to provide the family with a decent standard of living, and for themselves, so it turns out that a responsible adult who is able to take care of a child in the absence of parents is a real must-have. But often finding a good babysitter is harder than finding a needle in a haystack. In his new column, the expert "Oh!" Psychologist Anna Skavitina answered the 15 most popular parenting questions about nannies. Every mom should know this!

Modern families often face a serious problem: living in their own separate, rather comfortable apartments, they are deprived of the help and support of relatives for care and. In the morning, dads go to work for the whole day, and moms are left alone with the kids. It happens that in this mode, during the day, mothers do not even have enough time to have breakfast, clean up or change clothes. Grandmothers in our time less and less want to help their adult children in raising their grandchildren: they have their own life, hobbies, work. They believe that they have already raised their children, they want to do something for themselves.

In addition, young mothers often conflict with the older generation also because they believe that they themselves were raised incorrectly, so they deliberately do not claim the presence of grandmothers in the house on a regular basis. But it is not enough for any mother to raise a child without the help and support of others. That is why a nanny for many families becomes the only way out, the grandmother that the family chooses itself.

Long gone are the days when the presence of nannies indicated the elite status of a family. According to very inaccurate statistics, every tenth family with children uses regular babysitting services, and almost all irregular ones. With questions about nannies, they also come to a child psychologist. What are the most important things for parents? I will try to list the most popular questions and briefly answer them, and if you do not find the answer to your question in the text, write it in the comments, I will try to answer separately.

When to hire a nanny?

The moment you realize that you are missing one more hand in the house, and there is money that you are willing to spend on it. Do not pull, do not make a heroic deed out of your motherhood. The child needs a kind, ready to respond to his needs, and not an exhausted, unresponsive creature to any signals.

And I won’t hurt the child if I take a nanny, because mom is always better?

One very good mom, who made a big business, gave birth to three children. Contract. At the same time, she was sure that it was not worth giving birth to children if they were then given to a nanny, so she did everything herself, involving only the father of the family to the best of her ability and ability to care for children. When the children were 3, 2 and a year old, housemates mistook the young mom and dad for grandparents. After that, she looked in the mirror and decided: “That's it! Three nannies - and immediately! And I'm taking care of myself!" For her children, it was traumatic both the time spent with her mother without nannies - because the mother, and the time when the mother decided to take a break, transferring care of the kids to other people.
It's not about leaving your kids, it's likely to hurt them. It's about accepting the help you need for a limited time.

What if the children will love the nanny more than me?

A question that is asked by very insecure mothers. Believe me, in order for this to happen, the mother needs to try very hard: not to take care of the child at all, to constantly scream or do something else of little use. But even in such conditions, the mother will still remain a mother. The baby is huge! Tips on the Internet that call for changing the nanny more often so that the baby does not have time to become attached to her are tantamount to a mockery of own child. Imagine that you become friends with a person, and he suddenly disappears from your life.

What can I entrust to a nanny?

Is it necessary for a nanny to have a special education: medical or pedagogical?

Not always. Moms want to be able to get a qualified babysitter professional help, although they often just need second kind, calm and supportive hands, and they take them to doctors and developing circles not to a nanny, but separately. It is important that the nanny has experience interacting with children: professional or personal.

For example, mothers of several children usually do not work well with nannies who themselves have one child and therefore do not have experience in resolving conflicts between brothers and sisters. If you need constant medical manipulations with your child or you want to organize developmental classes at home, then special education is obviously needed.

One very interesting and intelligent woman with a Ph.D. in pedagogy retired to work as a nanny. She cleaned the apartment with high quality and cooked food, but she wondered why the employer was looking for a nanny with a higher pedagogical education, which was in no way in demand, except that her mother, on occasion, bragged about him to others.

What to do if you don't like the nanny?

It is important that mother and nanny are psychologically compatible. Even if the mother cannot really explain why she does not like the nanny, it is worth listening to the mother's intuition and changing the nanny. Try first to invite a nanny for a trial day, see how she communicates with children, with you, listen to your feelings. It is clear that the nanny will not be able to do everything exactly as you want, but is she ready to take criticism without intense resentment and change her behavior?

What if the parenting style that the nanny uses is very different from the parent's, is it harmful to the child?

Most likely, the parents themselves will not like it. Therefore, it is better to immediately look for a nanny who matches you in terms of.

Does a mother need to maintain the authority of a nanny and what to do if he is too big in the family? What if the nanny builds alliances with other family members (children, grandmothers)?

If you want to be sure that yours, maintain the authority of the nanny. The child must trust the nanny and listen to what she says. But do not forget that the main thing in the family is the parents. They are responsible for everything that happens to the child. If the nanny begins to "befriend mother" with other family members, contradict mother's ideas about upbringing, communicate with the child's grandmothers on the phone, "surrendering everything about everyone", she must be separated immediately. Suggestions and conversations do not work here. Mom needs to take her place in the family structure.

Who should like a nanny - a mother or a child?

Firstly, the nanny should please the mother and coincide with her ideas about what kind of help the family needs at this stage. Secondly, it is important for the mother to take a closer look at the child: does he enjoy spending time with the nanny, is he afraid of her coming, does he run away when she appears, especially if the nanny has already worked for you for some time. If possible, it is worth spending some time with the child and the nanny in order to look at their relationship from the inside. If you like several of the proposed nannies, ask the child to choose the one that he liked. One mother I know, while looking for a nanny in an agency, asked her child at the age of 1 year and 8 months to approach one of the five girls that he would like the most. The kid held out his hands to the young woman. Subsequently, the mother was not disappointed in the choice of the child.

What are the most important questions to ask a nanny in an interview?

There are not very many of them:

• What experience do you have with children?
• Do you have your own children?
• Who did they stay with when you worked? Who will they be with now if they are small?
• What is your relationship with your children? (Great when the nanny has experience in raising her own children and she is with them in good relations. It is strange if a nanny leaves her children and goes to take care of strangers, even because of a difficult financial situation).
• Give an example of how you usually respond to criticism. (You will try to understand if the nanny is ready to hear you and change).
• How do you cope in situations when the child does not fall asleep / does not eat / does not want to go out / refuses to learn lessons? (This is how you define the nanny's parenting style.)
• Do you apply punishment? Which?
• Do you have experience working with families? What can you tell about families? (For example, I do not trust nannies who immediately begin to leak information about former employers and their children).
• What do you like to do? What do you prefer to do with children? (You'll be lucky if the babysitter likes to do things that you don't like to do, even though you think it's good for the kids.)
• How do you feel about surveillance cameras? (Even if you are not going to put them in the house, ask to see if the nanny is ready to work under control).

If the nanny is not of the same nationality, what is the child? For example, a Filipina, how important is it for a nanny to have a good knowledge of the child's native language?

If you hire a nanny during the formation of your native language, from birth to five years old, and you know that the nanny will spend a lot of time with the child, then it is important that the nanny's speech is competent and clear. If you take a nanny who speaks another language (English, Chinese) in order for the child to master a second language from birth, then you must be sure that the nanny speaks correctly, because in this case she speaks with the child in her native language, and not in the baby's native language, all the time.

Different religions of the family and nanny. How to treat it?

If everything suits you, and to people of a different religion, nationality, skin color, then this will only serve as a good example for children and expand their understanding of the world. Public opinion may be different, you are not responsible for it.

What to do so that the child does not copy the nanny?

The child copies what he sees. This is one of the main ways of learning. Spend more time with your children and/or hire babysitters who can be role models for your child.

What to do if a nanny who has been working with a child for a long time suddenly quits? Do I need to say goodbye, remember, be sad, or is it better to forget as soon as possible?

We are all living people, and such situations happen to everyone. If possible, regardless of the age of the child, he should say goodbye to the nanny, explain in understandable terms the reason for her departure. If you parted on good terms, then from time to time it is worth meeting with the nanny, inviting her for a day or two to the child. But even if you say goodbye to the nanny in connection with a grandiose scandal, the disappearance of a person close to the child must be spoken out.

Are there good nannies?

Yes. Although on TV and in other media they often talk about terrible ones, but it just causes more emotions. talk about good nannies not so exciting. I know nannies who got a job in a family through an agency, who fully raised the child entrusted to them, because the mothers withdrew and even stopped paying salaries. But the brave nannies raised the children as their own, released them into the people, gave education. Often, nannies become practically relatives, working with the family for many years. It's great when your baby has another person who loves him and for whom he can have warm feelings.

Photo: Stokkete/Liderina/Lordn/Shutterstock.com

Our regular columnist told us about why she needed a nanny, despite the fact that her own mother was not opposed to taking care of her granddaughter. You can read about it in the column "Grandmother or babysitter: 4 myths that I want to debunk right now."

"Letidor" asked Nuria to tell in more detail how the search for a nanny for baby Safira went and what, based on her own experience, she can advise other parents.

Nuria Arkhipova

Finding a nanny is not as easy as it might seem at first glance. As soon as I decided to take an assistant, several questions arose in front of me at once:

1.** Where to look:** on the Internet or through an acquaintance?

2.** Which nanny is better:** a woman aged (40-50 years old) or a young one (under 30)?

3. How important availability of pedagogical education at the nanny?

4. Does the fact matter? the presence of the nanny's own children? Does this fact affect the attitude towards pupils? Or is it more important to find a person who just loves children?

5.** How to pay:** every day, once a week or monthly? Which do you prefer: hourly or daily?

6. And despite the fact that I have done more than one job interview in my life, I thought: what to look for when hiring a nanny?

7. The state of health of the future nanny: is it necessary have a medical certificate?

8.** How to control the work of a nanny**?

Where to look for a nanny

Despite the fact that I was extremely determined, I can not deny that I was not tormented by vague doubts. After all, it is normal to worry and worry about your children.

Initially, the search for a nanny was carried out with the help of specialized recruitment agencies, of which there are quite a lot on the market today. I settled on one of the most popular sites specializing in just a service for the selection of nannies. On it, there were filters by criteria, and an interactive map showing nannies in the district, and the presence of reviews from former employers. In addition, on the site you could immediately get acquainted with the age, education, experience, find out what kind of work schedule suits them and whether it matches your preferences.

True, an independent search for a nanny on the site is not a free service: to find a nanny, you need to pay 1290 rubles.

It seems to me that the money is lifting, and it is possible to spend it in order to get full access to the database and passport data of applicants. So, with the question of where to look, we figured it out.

Babysitter's age

As for age, I considered at least 40 years.

It seems to me that a younger nanny, especially if there are children of their own, who may still be small, will be more distracted by their children. A woman over forty has sufficient life experience, more responsible, as a rule, has adult children and experience in their upbringing.

I decided that the upper age limit is strictly 55 years.

Children grow fast enough, you will not notice how the child is one year old, and he will start walking and then running. Therefore, the nanny should be, in my opinion, a woman active enough to, if necessary, run after the child.

And in general, quick reaction and mobility, as you yourself understand, are very important when it comes to babies - before you have time to look around, everything that was found nearby is dragged into your mouth.

The presence of pedagogical education

While the child is small (1-3 years old), in my opinion, pedagogical education is not a necessity. Desirable, but not required. But a teacher will not interfere with a three-year-old child.

But what is needed for a baby is the presence of a medical education in a nanny.

She should know how to lower the temperature, what medicines to stop the first symptoms of a cold, in general, she can distinguish when a child is naughty, and when he is harmful because he gets sick. Such a nanny knows everything about complementary foods: when and what can be introduced, she will quickly understand if the child has an allergy to something.

Another great bonus, in my opinion, is the skills of professional massage for children under one year old.

It is very important to do gymnastics and massage with kids - this has a great effect on both physical and emotional development.

Nanny has own children

Having children of my own, in my opinion, is a good bonus for a woman, because it means that she has her own maternal experience.

In some reviews on the Internet, I saw advice that it is imperative to be interested in the marital status of the nanny, whether she has children, how old they are, what they do, where they live. In general, find out how she took place as a mother.

But it seems to me that a woman's wealth as a mother has nothing to do with her professional skills.

For me, having children is not a priority. If a woman loves children, knows how to get along with them, has extensive experience in caring for babies, which is confirmed by the positive recommendations of previous employers, has a medical and / or pedagogical education, then the absence of her own children will not be a reason for me to refuse her work.

How to make payment

On the site, each nanny-applicant has a tariff in the “Payment” column.

The average price in Moscow today is 300 rubles per hour. You can find cheaper - 150 rubles per hour, and more expensive - 350-450 rubles per hour.

You can choose a nanny with accommodation - here everyone proceeds from what is convenient for him. For me, hourly pay and a nanny who lives not so far from us turned out to be an excellent solution to all problems: she comes at the agreed time, spends a certain number of hours with the child and leaves.

By the way, you can arrange in advance with the nanny help with the housework and the execution of some assignments. Of course, I am against the fact that the nanny does household chores to the detriment of taking care of the child - it is more important for me that the baby is under constant supervision. But sometimes I still give her some orders.

It is also worth talking to the nanny in advance about overtime, possible overnight stays and feeding the child. How the child will eat is a very important question. You must think through everything in detail, because cooking a baby takes time. Yes, and an aptitude test would be nice to hold for a potential nanny if you want the child to eat not from cans.

We have solved this problem by itself: we have a grandmother who is a responsible chef who monitors the quality of dishes. But the nanny cooks and feeds Safira at the same time - that was my condition when applying for a job.

What to look for when hiring a nanny

At an interview with a nanny, you need to pay attention to EVERYTHING: how she behaves, how she talks, how she is dressed, how correct her speech is, how she smells.

Despite the fact that our nanny is by and large coming, she comes to our house every day. She spends several hours with Safira and with those who are in this moment at home.

You need to understand that by hiring a nanny, you get a new family member who will be with you and your baby for quite a long period of time. Therefore, be attentive to the smallest details.

Even if everything suits you - age, education, experience, recommendations - but you feel that something is wrong, that your soul is not lying, then it is better to refuse and continue the search.

At the interview, do not be shy to ask for certificates, diplomas and other documents. Ask for recommendations and be sure to call the numbers that the potential nanny will provide you. Meticulously find out everything, including the family situation: with whom he lives, what he does. If a woman does not live alone, but, for example, with children and grandchildren, you can ask why she does not deal with them.

But something else is more important: children of preschool and school age often get sick, the nanny will in this case be a constant source of infections for your child. You need it? I think no.

So the marital status of a potential nanny is no less important than her skills and education.

Having a medical certificate

Having a medical book is a must! I'm sure you understand why. In kindergarten and school teachers on cannon shot children will not be allowed to enter unless he has a medical permit, appropriate tests and all possible vaccinations.

If you fear that her certificate is invalid or bought, offer to go get tested and see a doctor together.

Is it worth it to hire a nanny for a baby under one year old? How to do it correctly if your answer is yes? Mothers share their experience - both positive and negative, and experienced child psychologist comments on options.

In an ideal world, the mother of a small child spends all her time with him, smiling happily and photographing all his small huge achievements. Mom calmly manages to play with the baby, cook amazingly delicious meals, and clean the house. She has good mood and financial well-being, allowing you to calmly be on maternity leave. However, even with such a magical scenario, sometimes there may be a need for a nanny: go to a friends birthday party or fly to rest by the warm sea, and just exhale and spend the day alone or with a friend, play with older children, if any.

The reality is usually more prosaic: many modern women, even while at home, they work almost immediately after giving birth - remotely or as a freelancer. Someone goes to work for part of the day, while others, for various reasons, work the prescribed eight hours away from the baby. The reasons are clear, and with all this, the institution of grandmothers in our time has practically outlived itself. In this case, you definitely cannot do without a nanny - and she must spend several hours a day every day with the child. And then the night, as perishing will turn out.

Mothers share their stories: how they managed to hire a nanny for a child under one year old, what came of it and what advice they can give, based on their experience, to other parents.

"Nanny is our best investment"

Inna, 35 years old, mother of two daughters aged 5 and 2:

“We hired a nanny to live in our big house and did it before the birth of our youngest daughter, so that the nanny had time to establish contact with all of us. The eldest daughter goes to Kindergarten, husband works on a rotational basis and I am an interior designer. In my profession, you can’t afford to stop working – constant contact is important to clients, and I spent too much time and effort on getting a solid base. Yes, and I can work right from home, all I need is silence and my laptop. A couple of times a week I go to a meeting or to shops to pick up the right items or materials on the spot.

We selected a nanny based on recommendations - I initially wanted a Filipina, I had a similar very positive experience with my eldest child, however, Milochka was two and a half at that time. Now that Lesya is already two, our Joe continues to live with us - and I don’t have a soul in her. She speaks good Russian and is fluent in English.

Our nanny has a serious medical education, received in the States, and, most importantly, she really loves children. And they pay her the same.

Joe takes great care of the girl - massages, bathes, feeds, and now plays with her. We take it with us on all trips.

I still continue to breastfeed my youngest. I also try to work in a sort of “shift method”: four hours in the morning, then I play with my daughter or we walk together, and Joe cooks dinner at this time, then I sit down at the computer during daytime sleep and stay there until 6 pm. By the time the eldest returns from the garden, I try to finish everything. Everything that I do not have time to do during the day, I finish in the evening, when the children go to bed.

Now we are thinking about a third child - we really want a boy. Of course, Joe will stay with us. It costs us a lot of money every month, but it's the best investment I've ever made. In the health of all members of my family and in my own peace. Opportunity for career growth and professional success.

I advise all doubters - a nanny is very much needed. Mom gets the opportunity to do what she loves and earn money, the child is under professional supervision, everyone is happy.

“I wouldn’t wish even my enemy that his children grow up with a nanny”

Arina, 37 years old, three children 1.5, 5 and 9 years old:

— My experience is very sad. I tried to hire a nanny for my two children - we ex-husband we live in different cities, my children are with me, I work as a financial controller in a large corporation. Decree for me is suicide, I can’t and don’t want to stay at home with a child. I feel that I am starting to grow dull and become a quarrelsome, overwhelmed aunt, and they let me take care of the child from work only for six months.

With my middle child, I hired a nanny when my son was six months old. At first everything was good and smooth: Valentina (name changed - Approx. Ed.) seemed decent and calm woman. A couple of months later, it turned out that she managed to steal money and food for little things, sleep with my husband when I was in the next room with the elder.

Naturally, I wrote a statement to her, now she is in prison - it turned out that the woman was generally on the international wanted list, she left the neighboring country, because there she was “shone” with a prison term for fraud.

My mother sat with Lesha before he entered the kindergarten. She protested, but there were no options. My husband and I then divorced, of course.

I found out about the third pregnancy too late - they tried to make peace with my husband, “reconciled”. I decided to give birth - and it was immediately clear that a nanny would be needed after my maternity six months. My mother refused to go to us again simply flatly, by that time her husband and I had finally parted.

I was looking for a nanny for a long time, frightened by the previous story. I think I found an older woman, as skinny as Peltzer. The next six months were real torture - my daughter was melting before our eyes. The nanny constantly smiled, said that everything was fine - but the child could see that everything was very bad, and it was getting worse every day. She constantly screamed at night, shuddered from sharp sounds, refused to eat the mixture.

I installed video surveillance - it did not work, our "Peltzer" did everything exactly as we agreed with her. I was close to insanity - from lack of sleep and despair. It was impossible to quit working - the family needed to be fed. Change jobs - nothing. Fire the nanny? Based on what? treat your daughter? From what? I never found out what it was. She decided to end the torment, she sent her mother to us, she simply put the question point-blank: either you are sitting with Lenochka, or consider that we are gone and you won’t have any more. My daughter seems to be on the mend, but it's all very difficult. I have a huge sense of guilt, I think that I am a disgusting mother.

I would not wish my enemy to have his little children grow up with a nanny. If you have even the slightest opportunity not to call a stranger into the house - do not do it. The kid will not be able to tell anything or just complain. I regret that I didn’t put pressure on the situation with my mother then and left my daughter with a nanny. Now we are dealing with a psychologist.

“I pay my older children for babysitting”

I don't have a nanny, and my youngest daughter is now one and a half months old. I didn’t go on any kind of decree - it’s simply impossible to freelance, and I don’t know how to just sit at home. My work as a journalist allows me to work at a time that I choose myself. Now my youngest daughter sleeps more often than she is awake - and I have time to write articles, breastfeed the baby and play with the middle one and read books with her. Then, of course, it will be different.

My older children are now almost 15, they are on unschooling. We agreed with them that for the duration of my work, if I need to sit or play with the younger girls (one and a half months and almost three years old daughters), it is easier for me to pay them, and not someone else's aunt.

This disciplines both me and them - they select developmental activities, I know for sure that I get my three or four hours of time for work.

However, I am fully aware that in six months my older daughter and son may refuse to be engaged in babysitting.

In this case, perhaps, I would hire a nanny, but I would choose her for a long time - so that I would like her purely as a human being.

With the permission of our heroines, children's psychologist Olga Trofimova commented on their stories.

- We will not discuss whether it is generally acceptable for a nanny to appear next to a child under one year old. Life is such that any of the mothers may find it necessary to earn money, and there is no need to choose - they do not work in the fields, you just cannot drag a child with a scarf on your belt. It’s good when a mother can work from home - it’s calmer for her, the child, and the nanny: all controversial or incomprehensible points can be resolved immediately on the spot.

All three stories are very revealing in their own way. Inna's situation can be considered ideal - her mother is always there, she can control the actions of the nanny, help with difficult or controversial situations. Even just the fact of the mother's presence helps the baby feel very well. It's good that the nanny immediately had contact with the little girl. In my practice, this happens with nannies from God - and this is perhaps the very first thing you should pay attention to when you first meet a hypothetical nanny.

Education, previous work experience matter, of course, but it is the person himself who should like you at first sight.

Your child should be very comfortable with him. It’s good when the nanny has the skills of a nurse or a professional massage therapist: up to a year, unfortunately, situations sometimes arise when urgent help from a medical specialist is needed.

Arina's situation shows all the disadvantages that are almost inevitable in a situation with a nanny for a child under one year old, if there is initially no contact between all the participants. The heroine is right: the baby is really not able to recognize the source of discomfort (cold or hot, want to eat or drink, bored or don’t like the toy). Even the rough skin on the nanny's hands or her smell, for example, can be unpleasant for a small person, he cannot say this or refuse to contact her - of course, he will react exactly as he can. Crying, whims, refusal to eat.

In general, a nanny is hired strictly for the child - so that someone is with him and takes care of him, but sometimes a nanny is hired for himself, no matter how strange it may sound.

Mom needs an adult female nanny who will be able to solve her own psychological problems, close some unresolved issues with her own mother, hug, figuratively speaking, her inner child. This is partly Arina's situation - I would advise her to contact a professional psychologist. We do not know why such a sad situation arose with her child and nanny. But it is obvious that at that moment the mother was in a rather severe psychological form, which could not but be projected onto her daughter, at least. Perhaps the nanny did something unacceptable in relation to the child - for example, smiling at her mother, she was cold and indifferent to the child, and children very subtly and precisely feel such things.

It is very important that normal working relations be built between mother and nanny: even the most beautiful nanny will not become either a grandmother or an aunt. Options for Pushkin's Arina Rodionovna, unfortunately, are more likely to be an exception to general rule in our time. So selfless women, able to sincerely live by the affairs of their new family, just not, perhaps. Much more often, manipulations can be observed in both directions - either the mother begins to violate boundaries, threatening the financial stability of the nanny, or she, in turn, can begin to use a good attitude towards herself, seeing that the child is clearly attached to her and the family is unlikely to be ready with her to part.

Xana's option is a compromise, the child is with his own children, with whom the relationship of the boss-subordinates on the part of the mother is built, this is quite convenient for everyone. In Russia, this is not the most common option, but in general, in many cultures and countries, it is teenagers who make up a rather noticeable class of nannies: their services are relatively cheap, they are energetic and inventive, quite diligent - at this age, the opportunity to have their own finances is highly valued, this gives a certain independence from parents.

The birth of a baby is a special event in the life of every family. A young mother in the first months is constantly with the child and takes care of him. A defenseless creature, more than ever, needs gentle hands and guardianship loved one. However, it happens that a mother needs outside help to care for a newborn. It's good when a grandmother can help with the baby. If this is not possible, then you should consider find a babysitter.

A nanny for newborns and infants is indispensable in the following cases:

1. If a young mother does not know how to handle a newborn. An experienced and qualified assistant will teach you all the nuances of caring for babies. After all, proper attachment to the chest, helping a child with colic or teething, an established bathing process is quite important during the growth and development of an infant. In this case, the nanny can come to you for several hours a day. The woman will teach you proper care for the newborn, so that later you can independently cope with the baby.
2. If the mother had a difficult birth or C-section. A woman is physically unable to fully care for a child. The nanny will fully look after the newborn, and you will recover and gain strength.
3. You can hire a babysitter for a newborn only for the night. It happens that for the whole day mom can not even sit down. At night, there is not enough strength to normally look after the crumbs. The assistant will be able to replace you at night, she will feed the child, soothe, change diapers.
4. A nanny for babies is suitable if twins or twins were born. In any case, mother herself cannot cope with two constantly crying and screaming children who require individual attention. Thus, you will take care of one baby, and an assistant will take care of the other.
5. There is another case when a nanny for a newborn is urgently needed - the mother urgently needs to go to work. In order not to lose a good job, the nurse needs to resume labor activity. But what about the chest? Hire a nanny, as only she will be able to fully care for the child, taking into account the growth and development of the baby by months.

In order for a nanny for a newborn to suit you completely, you need to take into account the professional and personal qualities of the applicant when choosing an assistant.

Firstly, a woman must have a medical education. Working with babies has its own specifics, since the child needs to be provided almost daily medical care. For example, babies often have constipation, colic, fever on the teeth.

Secondly, experience in families. Only the assistant who previously worked with this child will be able to fully care for the child. age category children. Experience is of no small importance. A good nanny will definitely have letters of recommendation with positive reviews from former employers.

Thirdly, the nanny must have a stress-resistant and patient character. Working with babies is quite difficult, as children often act up, cry, and do not sleep at night. The nanny has to cope with all the troubles that the baby can bring.

Fourthly, only a kind and sympathetic woman will be able to give her affection and love to a child. The nanny must sincerely love her ward. After all, a gentle touch tender word, a quivering look will not replace anything.

Approach the choice of a babysitter very responsibly. Well check all the information about the applicant, conduct a personal interview with her, talk with former employers, evaluate her work in practice. Remember that the comfort of the baby will depend on your choice.

A good nanny for a newborn can be found through private nanny announcements here. On a specialized service for the selection of domestic staff OurNanny.ru You will find exactly the specialist you have been looking for. A large number of babysitter profiles allow you to hire a baby care assistant who lives close to your home. Thanks to a convenient search system, you will select the most suitable candidates.

A babysitter is a great helper for mom in the postpartum period. An experienced woman will help you get the joy of a pleasant and not burdensome motherhood. With a nanny, you will be able to quickly recover from childbirth and put yourself in order. The assistant will teach you to enjoy spending time with the baby and unforgettable moments of happiness.

Article last updated: 03/28/2018

What is a babysitter like? This question is asked to themselves and other mothers who maintain a high pace of life. Many modern women strive to combine the upbringing of a child with a career, but in such a situation one cannot do without an assistant.

Child psychologist

Before looking for attendants, you need to think about what qualities a nanny should have. Usually they consider applicants with their children or women with experience in caring for newborn babies.

The ideal "Mary Poppins" must have an idea about the characteristics of the development of infants, the mode of falling asleep and waking, feeding. A big plus is the knowledge of the basics of caring for such young children. In general, there are many requirements for a specialist.

But, even knowing these basic requirements, every mother still asks numerous questions: how to choose a nanny for baby?, what should you pay attention to?, where to look for a governess and how to build relationships with her? See answers below.

Nanny for an infant: the main types of assistants

Of course, each specialist has his own working style and pedagogical skills. However, experts in working with domestic staff were able to group all applicants for vacant nannies into several types:

Profile medical specialization is a huge plus for domestic staff. Medical or nursing skills are especially useful for caring for a newborn child, since it is during this age period that sterility, first aid skills, etc. are important.

Advantages of such candidates:

• high accuracy;
• discipline (you can not be afraid of skipping medications);
• the possibility of providing additional services (massage, injection procedures);
• most medical nannies don't mind night shifts.

Minuses:

• provide only care, but not education (however, this shortcoming is debatable, since care will be enough in the first half of the year);
• as soon as the child gets used to it, you will have to look for a new home caregiver.

Another option is female pensioners, and not necessarily working as doctors or educators. The main thing is that they have the desire and ability to mess around with children.

The main advantage is a great life experience, raising their own children and grandchildren. In addition, many nannies-grandmothers approach caring for someone else's baby with all their hearts, and do not perceive such work solely as earnings.

Pros:

• great life experience;
• patience;
• love for children;
• usually a reasonable cost of services.

Minuses:

• ancient methods of education (however, in the first year of life, this drawback is irrelevant);
• age slowness and slowness;
• frequent remarks towards parents.

An elderly nanny is a tribute to traditions, because from time immemorial it was these “Arina Rodionovnas” who looked after the kids. In addition, many older nannies have free time, so they can sit with the baby all day and even linger if necessary.

Such a governess is still more suitable for older children, but if there are no other options, then a girl who is a student of a psychological, pedagogical or medical university can also sit with baby.

Pros:

• availability of services;
• babysitter activity;
• nannies are full of enthusiasm and creative ideas which will help her to interest and captivate the child.

Minuses:

• lack of experience in caring for a newborn baby;
• the difficulty of combining work and study schedules;
• not too serious about work.

First of all, it should be understood that such candidates, with rare exceptions, are not very responsible for temporary part-time jobs. Also, due to inexperience, caring for a baby will not be ideal (the exception is girls from families with younger brothers and sisters).

Perhaps this is the least preferred option among all possible. However, when the child grows up, the student nanny will become a good tutor or escort to visit museums, exhibitions and other cultural institutions.

Such specialists are professionals in the field of child care and development. Most often, these are women from 40 years old with a pedagogical or medical education, who have extensive experience working specifically with children. infancy.

Pros:

• professionalism;
• reliability;
• the ability to swaddle, feed the baby;
• knowledge of techniques for the development of infants;
• Ability to build relationships with employers.

Flaws:

• rather high cost of services.

In general, for children under one year old, a middle-aged nanny with a medical education and experience working with babies is most suitable. early age. Ideally, she should listen to the wishes of her parents, and not be guided by her own ideas about caring for a child.

Recruiting home staff is not so easy, because you want to find the perfect employee, especially when it comes to completely little child. To find the best candidate, experts recommend using several sources:

The question of where to choose a babysitter is really important. Most best options– agency and word of mouth. It is also worth taking note of Internet portals. And yet, it should be remembered that this is just the first stage in the selection of a nanny. A personal meeting is much more important.

How to choose a babysitter?

If you are going to hire a nanny for a child, you need to collect the maximum amount of information about her, since there are no trifles in this matter. For example, a governess who is fond of cigarettes and alcohol is not automatically suitable for looking after a child of any age.

To prevent possible negative situations, you should use several rules that will allow you to choose the most suitable candidate:

1. Be sure to ask the candidate for a passport. If she does not have official documents, it is impossible to trust a child to such a woman in any case.
2. Ask for references from previous jobs. It is not always possible to verify the veracity of reviews, so in this case, representatives of the agency have advantages.
3. It is extremely important to make sure in the presence of a medical book and the relevance of all examinations and vaccinations. If you have any doubts, you can suggest additional tests. However, in this case, such study will be at your expense.
4. Make sure that the nanny has a medical or pedagogical education(what is important in your case). It will be a big plus if the nurse knows how to massage or give injections. Possession of development methods in this age period not so relevant.
5. A nanny for an infant must be able to properly change diapers, swaddle, bathe and know how to feed children of this age. This can and should be tested in practice.
6. It is important to take into account the peculiarities of the behavior of the governess. She should be cultured, calm, restrained and polite. Rudeness, lack of education, incorrect pronunciation of words is unacceptable. This behavior can affect the development of the child.
7. Careful appearance - Another required condition. However, you should also pay attention to the fact that the nanny does not use cosmetics (for fear of allergies), does not wear bracelets, rings (they can scratch the child).

Such advice will help you choose a really experienced nanny who will not only follow the baby, but will also be able to prevent unforeseen situations.

A direct conversation with applicants is the most important stage in the selection of a nanny for a child. First of all, you should familiarize yourself with the documents, if possible, call previous employers, and you also need to get answers to a large number of necessary questions.

They should be compiled in advance, with special emphasis on the most significant nuances. Better questions Write it down on a piece of paper so you don't miss anything important. An indicative list of key points is provided below.

work experience

Experience in caring for infants is very important when hiring a nanny. This should be the first thing to ask, because explanations like “I raised two of my kids, so I am convinced that I can handle it” will not work.

The applicant can be asked the following questions:

1. How experienced are you in communicating with and caring for infants?
2. Why are you babysitting?
3. What is your past experience as a carer?
4. What did you do at your previous job?
5. Why did you leave your previous employer?
6. How did you and your child get used to each other?
7. What is the most difficult thing for you personally in caring for a child?
8. What do you want to know about my baby?
9. Do you have references from previous employers?

Questions related to personal life should also be asked. Naturally, you should not delve too deeply into the intimate sphere, but a general idea of ​​\u200b\u200bthe person should develop.

The most common personal questions are:

Candidate health

A nanny for an infant is the third most important person, of course, after mom and dad. Therefore, the problem of the health of candidates is extremely important, since babies are extremely susceptible to various bacterial and viral infections.

Mom should definitely ask the following:

1. Do you have a medical book?
2. Have you visited the fluorography room for a long time?
3. Do you have chronic illnesses? Which?
4. Can you walk your child outside long enough in winter?
5. Can you take the baby in your arms?
6. Do you smoke? Do you abuse alcohol?
7. Will you do additional tests at my request?

Unfortunately, some difficulties in the process of caring for a child cannot be avoided. That is why it is important to clarify with candidates for the position in advance how ready they are for non-standard situations.

Be sure to ask applicants for the following:

Emergencies

No family can do without force majeure when raising an infant. They can also arise while the child is with a visiting nanny, which is why it is imperative to ask how ready she is for unforeseen situations.

You can ask the woman what her actions will be if the child:

• choke;
• falls off the chair
• lose consciousness;
• will lie with ;
• hit the head;
• crying all the time;
• stopped breathing;
• received a burn;
• swallowed a foreign object.

In addition, the mother may ask some ambiguous questions that will help to understand how the applicant for the position is ready for force majeure or just understands the issues of caring for the baby.

For example, you can ask the nanny the following:

• Why can a baby cry? An experienced nanny will name at least 4 - 6 probable reasons: tummy hurts, wants to eat or drink, he is hot or cold, uncomfortable, bored, his diaper gets wet, etc.;
• Do you agree to the installation of a video camera? Usually, if a woman has nothing to hide, she agrees to video surveillance. However, it is important to understand that it is imperative to warn the applicant about these plans;
• If the weather is bad outside, will you go for a walk, as we agreed, or make your own decision? It is important to understand how a woman is capable of independent actions. Blindly following prescriptions is not always good;
• What do you think is the ideal child? A question like this will help you understand how the nanny handles unexpected situations. It is good if a woman dreams of seeing a baby healthy, active and curious. But if the applicant wants to see the crumbs obedient and calm, you should be wary.

When interviewing, be sure to touch on the issue of payment. It is necessary to clarify how much the nanny estimates an hour of her work. It is also worth knowing how best to pay for work: daily, weekly or monthly.

All these important points must be specified in the job description and contract. The last document is important because it insures all participants in the process from controversial situations. By the way, the main duties of a nanny should also be included in the contract.

Once a nanny for an infant has been selected, she must be familiarized with the terms of reference and the functions performed. They follow from a specific work schedule: full day, 5 - 6 hours a day, 2 - 3 days a week.

You also need to clarify whether the nanny will perform other activities, in addition to the direct care of the child. For example, a nurse can additionally clean the nursery, wash baby clothes, cook food for the baby.

The most approximate list of duties of a nanny to care for a newborn child may look like this:

• feeding the baby (it can be subject to a strict routine or take place on demand);
• cooking or reheating already prepared food;
• walks in the yard (in a nearby park) with a total duration of at least 2 - 4 hours a day;
• regular diaper change;
• washing the baby, the use of baby powders and ointments;
• washing and sterilization of bottles;
• swaddling a baby;
• dressing the baby in accordance with the temperature conditions of the room;
• play activities according to age;
• medical care, which may include massage treatments, gymnastic exercises, taking medications, visiting a clinic;
• listening to music;
• cleaning in the children's room;
• keeping a diary.

In addition to the list of responsibilities described above, some parents can add swimming training and child development according to a special methodology to the babysitting function. Naturally, all this must be discussed in advance and included in the employment contract.

From the mouth of a baby

If the nanny first goes to the bathroom to wash her hands, and only then approaches the newborn, this is very good. Otherwise, you should not even introduce her to a baby.

The next moment is to see how the nanny interacts with the baby: did she manage to establish contact with the baby, does she confidently hold him, rock him, does she give him a smile, does she kiss him, etc.

An experienced nanny understands without prompting that even a newborn needs to communicate. If the applicant thinks that conversations with such a small child are not needed, then her interaction will be mechanical, and this can harm the baby.

The final decision should be made after the nanny is left alone with the child. At first, a quarter of an hour is enough, during which mom will be in the next room.

If at this moment the child cries when he sees a stranger, do not rush to calm him down - on the contrary, observe the woman's behavior. If she calls you for help, we can conclude that she will not cope with the baby without your presence.

There are many rules for choosing a nanny for an infant. There is another important condition - whether you feel trust in this nanny. Such a subjective feeling sometimes arises at the first glance at a person.

However, this does not mean that you do not need to look through recommendations, study information about education, work experience. The following points must be taken into account:

Thus, the selection of a nanny for a newborn child must be approached very carefully and responsibly. It is important that it is liked not only by you, but also by the ward himself.

Of course, not a single, even the most experienced, nanny is able to replace a baby's mother, but a properly selected professional can make the process of raising a baby convenient and safe, which, in fact, parents are striving for.

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Hello, I'm Nadezhda Plotnikova. Having successfully studied at SUSU as a special psychologist, she devoted several years to working with children with developmental problems and advising parents on the upbringing of children. I apply the experience gained, including in the creation of psychological articles. Of course, in no case do I pretend to be the ultimate truth, but I hope that my articles will help dear readers deal with any difficulties.